Do You Know

Do you know what its like

      to exist instead of live.

Do you know what its like

      to not be able to say goodbye. 

Do you know what its like

      to have family tell you to go kill yourself.

 

Do you know what its like

      to lose everyone you care about.

Do you know what its like

      to love but not be loved in return.

Do you know what its like

      to know nobody cares.

 

Do you know what its like

      to have your family look down on you.

Do you know what its like 

      to want death.

Do you know what its like

      to cut yourself.

 

Do you know what its like

      to drink away your problems.

Do you know what its like

      to just not know anymore.

Do you know what its like

      to leave the one that was supposed to be.

 

Do you know what its like

      to almost die.

Do you know what its like

      to feel like the world hates you.

Do you know what its like

       to be cheated on.

 

Do you know what its like

      to be broken.

Do you know what its like

      to be afraid to call your own dad.

Do you know what its like

      to know nobody knows what you have been through.

Reviews

[The Wave]

wow

powerful piece..filled with emotion and definitely contains the strains that must be from personal experience.
its hard for people on the outside to relate to these such things.

overall, your style of writing is one thats very effective.
good job.

[Sharkapillar]

Yeah, I know what it's like. To make a long story short let's just say I sure as hell know what it's like to almost die.
I like how you can feel the emotion behind this, almost like I can hear you yelling it. Great job.

[Clouded in Hopeful Illu..]

I really like the idea of this poem and your style; however, the repition is a little lost throughout. Try the repition every three lines or so, sort of like:

"Do you know what its like
to not get to say goodbye.
to have family tell you to go kill yourself.
to exist instead of live.

Do you know what its like
to lose everyone you care about.
to love but not be loved in return.
to know nobody cares."

Other than that, I think this is a good poem. Thank you for sharing. Below are just suggestions. Take or leave them at your will.

"Do you know what its like
to not get to say goodbye."

-- Its is suppose to be it's.
Also, the wording in the second part is a little awkward. Try something like "to not be able to say goodbye" or simply "to not say goodbye?"


"Do you know what its like
to exist instead of live."

-- I really love this section. I feel like it is the strongest part of this poem and you could try to end or start with this part to make the piece as a whole stronger.

"Do you know what its like
to have the world hate you."

-- This detaches a little from the poem since the speaker can't really know how it feels for the world to not actually care. Try something like " Do you know what it's like to feel like the world hates you?"


=YourMidnightSecret=