Battle Cries and Surrenders

Another lyrics. :)

Give me a little spoon to taste a piece
of the universe.
I want a piece of the moon in the skies
of sweet regrets.

The backseat of my life is as empty
as your head have been
You've been trying to say it all
But I don't listen,
I can't hear - anything.

The silence shouts -
I should surrender.

Now the windy storm came
and gently froze my soul
"No matter how far we can go -
We are made to be alone"
But then again who have said that?

I have a battle cry and
It's called "love".

Smoke in my eyes and
a glass of wine to drown
my thoughts away
All the human attempts -
Failure to feel decent
And here I am
Waiting for my next decay.

No matter how much we love someone
we are made to be be alone -
Sanity's gone, sanity.

Being cool one day the next hundred -
I'm dull.
Sanity's gone, sanity.

I try to say it out loud - will whisper instead
How do I free myself of the need
of needing you?

The silence shouts - I should surrender.
But then again who have said that?

I have a battle cry and it's called "hope".
Dry all your tears - your voice is for real.
Dry all your tears - let the rain cry purity.

Reviews

[Shelby]

Very lovely. I love the back and forth of this, mirroring the back and forth of the mind. I love you, but it doesn't matter because we're all alone, but then again, who believes that, etc. It's a very relateable sentiment. You strike a good rhythm and keep it going throughout, so even though this is mostly free verse, you can get into the beat and go along. poems don't need rhymes to be good, and you proved that. My favorite lines were:

"I try to say it out loud - will whisper instead
How do I free myself of the need
of needing you?"

The double use of the word "need" was very clever (I'm fascinated by word play at the moment and it is something you excel at) I did notice some grammar problems, but others seemed to have touched on this pretty thoroughly, so I'll leave it up to them. I love reading your work, as always, and I am always impressed with the emotion you put so beautifully to words. Well done, and thank you for sharing this with me.

[Patches I'm not so new..]

An affimative piece finally at long long last one that talks of love and hope! I myself am a cynic I tend to see the dowside of things rather than the upside for long ago I subscribed to the theory "to always look look for the woprst that way you will never be disappointed." But like without good there can be no evil the fact that you have looked on the bright side balences out with my theory and the world keeps spinning.

[Richard Williams]

I like this good write, like "Give me a little spoon to taste a piece of the universe." That's exactly right.

[J Michael Simmonds]

I love this. This is actually something I really needed to hear. As I wanted to just surrender. Be rebellious and do my thing. I love the last few lines that was what really spoke to me. Thanks very much.

[Midnight_Mystery]

enjoyed this..nicely done! :)

[Katie]

I enjoyed these lyrics. I couldn't hear music behind them myself this time, but I have no doubt that they would go well to music. This will mke an excellent song

A few gramatical errors.

"The backseat of my life is as empty
as your head have been"
Should be
"The backseat of my life is as empty
as your head has been"

"But then again who have said that?"
Should be
But then again, who has said that?

[Rikkevi Rue]

grammar aside this poem speaks from the soul and the hurt is palpable... My favorite lines:

"Give me a little spoon to taste a piece of the universe...

and

The silence shouts - I should surrender."

These shine with the brilliance of great poetry.

[sentimental~ galore]

Over the span of reading your poetry i have become a fan. This poem is real and pretty sentimental i must say. THE emotions are like movement, and i feel like i am in a thunder strorm.

[iamkim]

Uh-oh! ...made to be alone :(( that hurts!

"I have a battle cry and
It's called "love" --- my favorite!

Good job!

[Stef Outsiders]

Do you ever place music to these songs and sing them? I think you should and then place them on youtube or my space, cause when i read lyrics i hear it in my head. Sounds crazy, I hear this being sung with an indie/rock or just guitar with a piano...
Another brilliant piece, you have a gift for lyrics!