In-patient Psychiatric Ward

Inspiration came about from a conversation with my psychiatrist.

In-patient Psychiatric Ward

"Just sign your name here."

My hand struggles

To find stability.

You just need

Some extra help
It will be alright.

"No one is making you."

No,

But I stopped taking my medicine 

Once again.

My eating disorder

Is driving me nuts.

I'm refusing help.

"You know,

You don't have to 
Check yourself in."

I know,

But I want to eat

Like a normal person.
I don't want my anxiety

To stop me

From anything.

I don't want to solve problems

By cutting myself
Or punching the wall.

I want to be a normal student 

In school.

"Well?"

I'm just scared

Of recovering.

There is still a part of me

That thinks I can do it

All by myself,

That I don't need help.

I tap the pen 

On the table.

It's been three years.

You deserve to be better.

What is there to lose?

My signature 
Turns out

To look like

A bunch of scribbles.

_______________________________________________________________________

mental illness awareness jewelry

Author's Note

Hope you enjoyed the reading. Any and all criticism is appreciated. Take Care! Stay Strong! :)

Reviews

[ScarletButterfly]

Wow. I really like the dynamic of this poem. With the receptionist speaking in between the thoughts of the speaker. This really shows the struggle to get help, especially since people who may need it want to try on their own as long as they can. And I love how it ends by describing the signature. Great job!

[Blue Belle]

Thank you for your encouraging and uplifted comments. :)

[Zap-the-awesome]

I really like this. Good work

[Blue Belle]

Thanks

[Chris]

strong image...

[Blue Belle]

Thanks

[I Am Svetlana]

Recovery is always a tough decision for any type of addict. I understand the eating disorder, I've been through it, still am going through it...I don't like how it's made me, but somehow, I've liked how it's made me. I like the place it's put me in from time to time, where I feel okay and not depressed or down. I don't have to eat all the time, but just enough where I feel a bit full, then I can rest and snack more later without anyone caring. It's tough to recover from an addiction and it's okay to ask for help. I understand addiction fully well, it's tough, but recovery is possible someday. I promise

[Blue Belle]

Thank you.

[Ravyne Hawke]

It's true, we always think we can do recovery alone.. but the sad reality is, we need the help. Love the inner struggle that you portray here and the impatience of the worker. Well done!

[Blue Belle]

Thanks! It is partially fiction because I've never been to the hospital for these certain issues.

[Ravyne Hawke]

I hope you continue to work on them and stay away from the hospital.. not a fun place to be.