Pull me under

2:03AM Insomnia, I have nothing much to do.

I'm drifting away,

a very small price to pay.

Intoxicated; I'm slipping deep down,

peaceful withering, I'm falling.

Completely exhilarating, I never want to come back.

No. I wont go back, to the inendurible pain.

This place, right now, the darkness: keeps me sane.

The acheing... What's the cause?

To go back, to look at my flaws?

I feel so cold, but it feels right. I'm bewildered...

What exactly happened? I have no care now, really.

I feel right, here, it leaves not one mark.

It burns, but I feel at ease.

Leave me die-if this is dying-please?

I'll never get to say goodbye,

even though I don't want to. Wouldn't it have been right?

To put up a fight? I'm not kicking, I won't, this place hurts in an amazing way.

A new sensation.

So I'll continue to fade, leaving everything left behind.

This burning... I like this kind.

It feels like the burning from ashes from a cigarette,

Ha ha ha, I will not fret.

Do your worse, because it's heaven to me.

So I'll drift away,

Please... Pull me under...

I'm going deeper, in this pool of fire,

deeper into the darkness, I won't try to come back for air.

I won't even dare.

To try, but why? Why exactly should I?

Pierced with the pain, you placed upon my shattered heart,

this world can't hold me any longer.

I lingered long enough, from the fate that has crossed me.

I'm so sorry, but this is peaceful to me.

I'm blind, I can't see,

I only see, the greatness infront of me.

With the final gasp, I breathed your name.

I finally ended, this moronic game.

I chose my path, as you chose yours,

It's decided.

So I'll drift away, this very day,

Please... Pull me under...

In this pool of fire.

Burning.

A new sensation.

 

 

 

Author's Note

Bleh.
Finished at 2:31AM. lol.

Reviews

[Lesley]

I think that your poem conveys a lot of emotion, which I always find to be the most important element of poetry. You have a great way of expressing yourself entirely through your work, and that is something difficult to come by. My one critique is that I think your poem is a little repetitive. Consider what you are trying to convey and then say it in your style with as few words as necessary; this will keep it more engaging. Thank you so much for sharing, I really enjoyed reading it and I hope to read more from you!

[Kelley]

Your writing is very good Justy. The more I read the more I like it.
Thanks for sharing.

Kelley

[Limitality]

Music, is poetry.
Same thing re-versed.
Of course it is suppose to be repetitive.
I'm trying to get a point across, but thank you.

[Forest Green]

Through the difficulties of semantics, you've made a pretty dark point. Letting death (it seems to me) take one down to the heat of eternity is a troubling imagery. But, you've presented it poetically and with very little ambivalence.

Nice work...but let hope keep you afloat. ;)

Daniel

[Wildecat]

Excellence at its very best, a pleasure to read such a wonderful poem.

[Eagle Cruagh]

So I'll drift away, this very day,

Please... Pull me under...

In this pool of fire.

Burning.

At 2:31 AM---- What vitality, what endurance !

The writer has produced a poem of sensational
mood and emotion. Excellent writing.

It seems the writer is talking about
the very essence of a love affair,
at one point speaking of bliss and the
next moment enveloped in pain and dread.
An altogether geat literary effort.

My Favorite !
Please write more-----soon.

---- Eagle Cruagh

[XxLovexLuckyxX]

Very good. I enjoyed reading it.