Life with an empty soul

Short story about the thoughts rumbling through a young girls mind.

Possibilities were infinite and time felt short. 

Now time feels infinite and there are no possibilites.

How can one place have so much effect on your life. 

Answer. It doesn’t. It is an excuse that you permanently believe. 

I don’t remember what it’s like to have a goal anymore. 

I don’t know myself like I used to. 

What’s worse is that I thought I did not know myself then either. 

Now I’m really screwed. 

This place is soul sucking, heart wrenching, and just plain boring. 

How anyone would stay here when there is true happiness out there is beyond my little comprehension. 

Life feels so empty and bleak. 

Pretty things cost money, money takes work, and work takes effort. 

If your soul feels empty, you are essentially drained and have no will left. 

Sometimes you just need to splurge some of the small savings you have left and buy something to fulfill that needed dopamine rush.

Because seriously, how else are you going to survive this wretched day? 

I used to say I have too many friends. 

Well I guess they all eventually heard me and left. 

Now I brag about having no friends. 

I say this to you and also my parents. 

They are your friends I suppose, right? 

What choice do they have. Yes. 

I didn’t start playing with dolls till I was a teenager. 

I wonder what a psychiatrist would say about that. 

Perhaps nothing, I just like to analyze myself. 

Living in my own head seems like the only living I do anymore.

Author's Note

Thoughts?