Masks

This is my epitaph 

This is my Omega 

This is the should that will never return to Eden.

With every sin I find myself falling deeper into hate

and farther from grace. 

I've been robbed

I've been raped 

Paradise lost along with innocence 

and I can't help but feel that ignorance is truly bliss. 

I've always regard emotion as a beast

Devouring the weak

and preying on the meek.

The fable I told myself every night 

as I laid awake petrified with fright. 

Was that if I taught myself not to care

unlearned how to feel

I would never get hurt

I'd never kneel. 

So I imprisoned all those thoughts in the highest tower

threw the key away 

and stripped them of their power.

I left empathy to the rack 

and remorse to the wheel 

Five pain to love

and scaphism for fear 

I took to the stage and became 

an actress transcending the name. 

I played Ophelia in distress 

and Oedipus in unrest 

I wore masks so beautiful the crowd forgot they were fake

and I couldn't hear my own silence through the cheers until it was too late. 

I could bring Godot to tears 

but not summon my own 

For they'd languished in exile for too long. 

And everyone around me saw only the part I played

The girl behind the mask proceeded to fade.

And Neitzche laughed when I removed the false face

and found behind it

empty space.