Sentenced To Hell

Judgement has deliver you to...

The orchestra of death sings

                                 Their voice sinful and pretty...

               Saying what lies ahead...

                                       All ladies of red and black...

 

Desperately...

   Running away from the singing...

                              On a road filled with suffering bodies...

                Like the one he read on Dante's Inferno...

 

He heard a voice saying: "Don't cry"

                        The voice was his partner  

                            Who died in the time they were robbing a bank...

    The body was naked, skinned and bloodied...

 

He said in a hazy voice: "Don't cry, it's all your fault anyway"

                       "You left me there shot and wounded"

          "Now it's your turn to rot"

                           He began laughing while thorns peirced his body

 

He ran....ran....and ran...

                            Deeper in the depths of the abyss

                 Trying to escape...

                                From the sins etched in his veins

                    He screamed his warcry and kneel helplessly asking forgiveness to God...

Reviews

[PaperLife]

Oh yes. This is poetry, this is life as it softly fades into the last moments of death. This is the quiet you hear right after the orchestra stops playing. This... this is what i love. Your words are dark but shine so brightly, forming their darkness like a cloud. Screaming out in the softness that dies so quietly as the last words fall into a sleep never again to wake from. It spreads goosebumps, it sheds tears, and leaves no room to apologize. Beautiful. Deep. Dark. AMAZING.

[Blood_Vamp]

Wow...Dark Poetry you truly have a gift. You are very descriptive and took me to be "Sentenced to Hell" Great writing, thx.

[samantha munning]

im speachless

[Mockingbird]

it does remind me of one of the circles of hell in the inferno. sounds like a morbid nightmare. great job.

[joshua deathdealer]

A nice story with gruesome imagery. Kinda mysterious as well with the bank robbing partner and all. Which I like. Nice work.

[exotic flotsam]

I liked this up until the closing few stanzas. This feels more provacative than it arrives. Which abyss? Robbing a bank? I felt something much bigger than that, and awaited its arrival. I liked that you referred to Dante, a wildly intoxicating, eruidite piece. I loose track before he asks forgiveness from God. One vein of your tale is profound, the other, later, tacked on as a neccessary conclusion. Not all stories within us have a resolution. Sometimes we just have to hang. And wonder.

[Brianna Van Zandt]

I like this a lot. Just a few errors I noticed. "Torns" pierced his body? Did you mean thorns? Also, "Screamed" and "kneel" are in the same line, but there is no unifying tense. I think it should be either "screamed" and "knelt" or "kneeled", or "screams" and "kneels." Just wanted to put it out there. Still wonderful. I could actually picture that "...road filled with suffering bodies... Like the one he read on Dante's Inferno...", as I am currently reading Dante's Inferno, as well as playing the game for a second time. With that in mind, the setting of Dante's Inferno, this poem became even better because the way I saw it in my head was perfectly described in your words. I absolutely loved it. Beautifully dark. Keep it up!

[Sarah W. French]

this is wonderfully dark. I love the lines: Trying to escape... From the sins etched in his veins. I really like the thought that was put into this poem.

[Poetic Beauty]

I love this whole poem with the grand dark details. The ending is fitting for a poem like this.