Prompt 6 - Beautiful

All I ever wanted was to be beautiful. A story based off of my own life and a beautiful quote Warning: Rape and prostitution mentioned

Nimble fingers trying their best not to skip like a broken record as button by button a snippet of milky skin was revealed. They called her beautiful. Told her how pretty she was as they all watched her but she knew the truth. She was nothing but an object. A mindless drone used for nothing but a quick joy ride. But it didn't matter, money was money, no matter how you got it.

The man grinned as she fondled her breast through the black lace bra she wore and rubbed himself earnestly as she moaned the same recycled moan she used for every man. Over the camera screen he whistled softly as his breathing became slightly breathy, he was close, it would be over soon. She gave him a wink, dipping her hands into her panties and pretending to enjoy herself, to love his presence, to force herself to give this man her body. It was all the same. The small noise she made as she arched her back like she hadn't done this a million times. Satisfied, the man came, she said nothing, only throwing a robe over her body and nodding when he promised to send her money.

The lights came down, the camera blinking off just like the smile that rested on her soft lips. Gray eyes dimmed with shame she let the tears flow freely, the carefully applied make-up now streaming down her face in long lines of sadness. Her eyelashes were a galaxy of tears while her eyes were a black hole, a empty void now. Pale lips with pink lipstick smeared across her face touched the base of the vodka bottle as she chugged it down. It's burn was nothing compared to the feeling of shame in her heart.

Fat tears bursted from her eyes, billowing gently down her cheeks leaving blotches of dollar store mascara and cheap glitter. With each gulp of liquor the pain grew as well as the surplus of tears. They spilled unto her lap and held the pain she felt. Each slow drop of vodka that slipped down her throat made her forget. Made her lose a past hardship. Made her feel beautiful. Gulp -- goodbye child abuse. Swallow -- see ya later rape that still haunted her thoughts since freshman year of high school.

The silk robe she wore hugged her tightly. Like a mother who cradled her child, and she took comfort in that. Knees drawn close to her chest, she let a few more swallows find their way down her throat. Fire. It burned yet she craved it more and more. Glug glug. Drink until you're beautiful.

She remembers being happy. With baby's breath in her hair as she ran through the grass, sundress loosely flapping in the breeze. Climbing trees, sitting on the swings, just laughing. The only time she felt truly alive. Her grandparents. They cared for her, made her feel truly beautiful. There was no ugliness in their eyes. She was beautiful. She didn't need make-up back then to make her pretty. Only a genuine smile. She didn't need drinks to make her happy, just her imagination.

The brown hair that framed her face lay obscured, clinging to her as she cried. Each sob racking her body and sending chills down her body. The bottle in her hand was empty. She groaned loudly and threw it to the ground, allowing it to shatter. The shrill sound of her phone cut off her fit.

Life came back to her. Knocking her longing for her young euphoric days. She collected herself and sat up humbly.

Her crying ceased, she redid her make-up at the soft ping of her phone went off. She inhaled shakily and painted in that beautiful smile as she answered the phone. Pink lips quivering but her voice soft and seductive. Like a beautiful girl should be. .