What I sometimes feel

My mind is tired
My eyes hurt from
The continual throbbing lights
That shine through them
Not towards them
So many moments lost to
Misunderstanding
The peolpe
Who really matter
Too many hardships
Because of lack of money
And resources
I have stood humbled
When looking into the eyes of the dying man
I have stood torn
As they laid the child
Taken from my womb
Into the ground so cold
And yet
And yet
I still don't seem to understand
The workings of my soul
Mutter not
If you do not weep
When in love with the rose
Which has thorns
And kills you on the  inside
I love the air I breathe
I love the hearts that are touched by mine
But when they turn and try to love me back
Shamefully I turn
And look for comfort
In  barren lands
Holding my head in my hands
I prey there be another day
Far from now
where I may wash away my sins
I know not what they are
But they must be great
For life to mock me so

Some day I will look upon the beauty
of myself and know that
what I have become is all I need to be

Reviews

[Joel M Frye]

No matter from whence we have come, we are all sufficient unto the day. Even with the darkness we carry, we are the bearer of light to some. The last tercet belies all that came before it. When you no longer look to the barrens for love, and can accept what is offered without shame...you will find your true beauty, Pebbs. And beautiful you are.

[Neva Flores Smith - Cha..]

Sometimes we are afraid to give all of ourselves when we have lost so much. It is like we expect a tornado at the end of the yellow brick road. Well done Pebbles

[Richielee]

oh Pebs, my eyes are tearing up,the love you give out is so genuine and the time you set aside for others is generous, that last stanza made me sad because you're one helluva decent lady. just look in the mirror,it never lies : )

[Hello, Goodbye]

love the last little portion, the self declaration of acceptance.. this is great poetic expression of streaming consciousness.. good stuff..