All the Shades

I can't call it love, it wasn't
I can't really mourn you or us, there wasn't
I can't be jealous of other girls having you, you were never mine
can't really miss you, it's unrequited
I can't want to see you again, it's forbidden
I can't want to do it all over again, it never happened

It wasn't you that I loved but the illusion
It wasn't your words that comforted me but my interpretation of them
So tell me how to lose you when I never had you
When people ask, what should I tell them?
About my sincerity or your cruelty
my innocence for your ambiguity
Which story is true?
What do we call it? What we had - me and you?