A Maiden Sleeps

 Clicking on the inbox to reveal the contents inside. I see the words "A Maiden Sleeps" and  feel tears sting my eyes. Those words took me to another place and another time.

I can see it clearly so real in my mind. I remember I stood beside her while she lay, peering into her deep green eyes that once were bright and full of life, now lay listless. I longed to touch her and hold her hand but at that age I didnt understand. I was scared to touch her afraid I would get in trouble, so I stayed there right beside her instead. I wanted to make everything better, but I was too young and not strong enough.

She wore her wig one last time for this special occasion. Her eyes darkened and her face so pale, it was hard to recognize her. But I saw a smile form just so slightly then as quickly swept away. She was saying goodbye to her little boy who was turning 5 that day. I wasn't important at that time and I didn't think she knew I was in the room. She was fighting with all the strength she had to stay alert for her little one.

I stand in that room now as an adult and so many things I understand and would change. I would run to her and squeeze her tight and tell her all the things I never did. I didn't know then it would be my last chance. I didn't know my angel would leave.

After that day, life continued as normal as Christmas was soon approaching. School was out and the anitcipation of presents was more than I could take. It was Christmas Eve at last. Sitting in my room like I did often in those days, trying to avoid my dad.

My father yelled for me to come out and sit on the sofa with my brother, he had something say. Being a kid and being afraid my mind raced to what I might have done wrong. but the words he spoke were not of anger though sadness was not there either. With words simple and bleak her said, "Your Aunt Kris is dead."

My beautiful Aunt who I loved so much, had gave up the fight after all. I only just saw her 8 days ago. She is the maiden who sleeps. My fair lady Kris, beauty so rare. I miss her and wish she were here.

Reviews

[Martin See]

Poignant story of the passing of a loved one. Definitely strikes a chord in my heart as my late sister passed on when I was a kid. And I was like your protagonist - unsure of the protocols. Yet now older but none the wiser, I would now think that I could have expressed my grief or concern when my sister was ill in a more appropriate manner. I found the nuances of what is expected behavior when someone passes on, very grey in the instance of social expectations. Concern or grief is something very personal, and different folks would express it in various ways. So who's to say what is socially acceptable? A story of reality told extraordinarily - thumbs up!!

[persianleopard]

So nice... :)

[EMF]

This is beautiful. Touching and deeply sad. Normaly I would not read work such as this, but the writing drew me in and I was captivated by the words. Stunning

[Alexus Shanae]

This is beautiful, the sadness made me ache. I am impressed with your skills as a writer to capture it all in these short paragraphs.

[Clayton Bardwell]

You're welcome. I hope you will return the favor. This place and these people offer such a rich mix of writers that I hope you and they will help me make my stories the best they can be.
This really is a beautiful and poignant story about a beautiful woman sans the part where your father is the bearer of bad news. I’m not sure I’m going to like him.
What is it about red hair, green eyes, and a purple dress that keeps her vision in my mind?
If you continue to stomp a mud hole in my heart I hope there is going to be a payoff downstream somewhere. A moral, a parable, or something to ease the pain you make me feel.
Anyway, great job. Now where’s that whisky?

[Coyote Poetry]

A sad and beautiful story. You honor the memory of this beautiful woman. The description allow the reader to understand the emotion of this poem. Hard to lose the special people in our life. We must remember their faces and voices. Thank you for sharing the excellent story.
Coyote

[Liderien]

You are my savior Arthur! Thank you very much. I fixed it and also thank you all for such kind words. I know this could be much better, it is only a draft and will be edited to become a masterpiece. Thank you fro the kind reviews

[P.S.Chance]

awe ... she must have been a sweet Maiden, indeed. Your life is better having had her in it - It seems they shouldn't be able to leave without us, doesn't it? This is a good piece of writing.

[Renée]

Beautiful ...we all have regrets...I am sure she knew how u felt