Aunt Alana

The ride to my aunt's and uncle a was quite. My father was the only one who accompanied me because my brother was still healing from his burns and my mother was to upset to come with us.

My father stopped the truck in front of a lone stone house with a oak wrap around porch on the porch stood my aunt Alana. My aunt was five foot five with longer hay blonde hair in a broad she work a long sleeve grey baggy shirt and blue jeans with paint spots over them.

My father opened my door "Come on Ivette." I climbed out of the truck and looked at my aunt she had to look up at me to meet my eyes "Hey there kiddo it's been awhile since I've seen you ." I smiled "Hi aunt Alana ." My aunt hugged me "Well let's get your things and put them in your room."

I carried most of my things but my father had to bring in my jewelry box because it was too fragile to be carried with the rest of my things. I sat my stuff down in my new room it was medium sized and the walls were plain white and my bedding was a shade of light pink , there was a t.v. , a closet , a dresser, a lamp, and a bedside dresser with a plain black alarm clock set to wake me up for school.

I walked out of the room to the living room I stopped in My tracks when I hear my aunt and uncle speak "Mason , you know she will be safe here." My father coughed "Alana please take care of her she's my only daughter , please you and your husband take care of her." I heard my aunt sniffle "You know we will Mason she is my only niece , how can I not take her in."

I walked in to the living room and acted like I did not know a thing. " All my things are in the room aunt Alana." My aunt looked to me "Good now say goodbye to your pa."

I walked up to my father and looked up to him and wrapped my arms around him smelling the smell of cigarettes and the breakfast we grabbed at McDonald's hash browns and a chicken sandwich bisect for him. " I love you pa." I heard him gulp "I love you too Ivette , listen to your aunt and uncle and be a good young lady for them." I hugged my father tighter "I will pa tell ma and Sawyer I I will miss them and I love them and tell Sawyer I'm so sorry." My father hugged me back "He knows sweetie and we will miss you too Ivette We love you."

My father was the first to let go "Goodbye Ivette." I felt tears come to my eyes "Goodbye Pa ." I saw him walk out the door and began to cry as I heard the truck leave the drive way.

I felt my aunt grab my shoulder "Ivette , this is for the best." I managed to swallow my pain "I know." My aunt turned me towards her and hugged me "Good , now get washed up and changed for supper your uncle will be home soon and we have a lot to talk about."

I looked down at my aunt "Yes aunt Alana." My aunt smiled and patted me on my back as I ran back to my new room to get ready for dinner we with my aunt and uncle , ready yet afraid of what was to come next.

Reviews

[C. Rose]

Good attention to detail.
I can tell your grammar and formatting is much improved from the last book I read of yours, but you still need to be careful (my mother was to upset) should be (my mother was too upset).

[Kamari's]

Yes I am going back and editing once I finish the book

[Rene Salinas]

Again first suggestion , revision as there are minor typos and sentences you might want to re- arrange but I understand that at the moment I should just ignore that, so I am. The unfolding in this chapter is different it felt to as if you had to stop and let us know by describing which means that you think we should know about the characters and then the Aunt seems cute. Petite and Pretty. Is peculiar at this point how much they care for one another. It still feels to me as if there is a reason for that we will see. Worth mentioning that as descrptions go then we know the rough wherwabut based on how they talk, and how much of the family nucleus is put here to the forefront. It makes me think of olden times even.

Another layer.

Thankyou

[Kamari's]

Yes brownie points

[Wórdsmíth]

Oh your Aunt`s too "blonde"? That`s also good by me.
The imagery`s quiet heartfelt. I`m glad that you`ve put some of the combination of emotions (with smiles) in this chapter. "Emotions" are the "pulse" to an every stuff then.. whether it`s a poem or a chapter/novel.. "emotions" always break the walls and get in to the shells of reader`s heart easily and in this chapter, I find such things. Eventually. Great job!

[Kamari's]

Yes she is it's my character and thank you