A Simplistic Narrative of Suicidal Ideation.

This is the end
I am decided 
I'm going to kill myself
These feelings I
Keep building up
Will no longer rule my...life
Strike myself down
Or otherwise
Stop my heart beating its rhythm
Because what's the point
Of leading yourself
Along with constant lying
Of coming positivity
Around the corner, now
But no, it's not
Further afield 
Than you ever could've thought 
So why continue
With such torment
Pain and grief aplenty
When you can just avoid it all
And here is reasoning
You're broken and
You're twisted in
A hurricane of self loathing 
Whirling around with no stability
Why bother 
Why care I ask
But I won't bother 
And I won't care 
When I slit veins
Or swallow pills
Or jump off of 
A balcony
Falling 
Falling 
Falling
Splatter against the cold
Dark pavement 
Blood runs in the drains
Washed away by rainwater
Which doesn't judge or know 
Even who you are...
Only sees a corpse to rinse
In a deep black watery caress
Maybe I'll go to Switzerland
It's dear but oh so legal
Less familial bureaucracy
And questioning to deal with
I'll leave this on the kitchen table
At exactly eight o two
When I put my bag 
Upon my shoulder 
Head out to school
For the distractions
Of the day
I don't intend on 
Reaching the gates
Seeing friends or teachers either
Instead I'll head 
Down to the marsh
And doodle pictures of 
Normal things nowadays
Like crucifixes and pentagrams
Demons, goth galore
Or maybe even write a song
On the suffering of an idol
And when I'm done I'll
Fill my bags and pockets
With rocks and pebbles
I'll cut my wrists with 
The sharpest of my stationery
I will launch from the bridge 
And break through the ice
Crack
This is the end
I am decided 
I'm going to kill myself.