Crimson Love (Prologue)

This is to be a story of love and though it may seem like incest, Colette and Cain are not related by blood so...yeah! Read on!

 

Prologue:

A World Torn Apart

 

The night was dark, the sky filled with purple clouds that looked ready to open up and pour rain at any second.  The field on which the two armies stood was already filled with the mixed blood of their comrades.  Both armies were beaten and tired.  This was to be the final battle.  The captains from both sides stepped forward, walking towards each other, their eyes staying fixed on their opponent’s.  One of the captains wore full samurai aymor.  He had short black hair and gold-green eyes.  He went by the name of Cain.  The other was dressed in a full, black ninja costume.  He had long blonde  hair tied back in a tight ponytail.  The color was such a white blonde it was almost silver.  Over the mask that covered his nose and mouth were a dreamers gray eyes.  His name was not known.  The battle began, both warriors drawing their swords.  They rushed at each other, their swords connecting with a sounding crash.  They leaped away from each other and circled warily.  Then they began fighting again.  Their fight was that of a beautifully choreographed dance of death.  Suddenly it ended as Cain’s sword broke through the ninjas guard and slashed open his heart.  The ninja fell to the ground and as he did his mask came untied and dropped beside him.  The ninja was a girl.  Cain’s eyes opened wide with shock as he let out a cry of anguish and pulled the girl into his arms. 

“Colette!, he cried, “No, Colette!  You can’t leave me!, he sobbed.

“Oh, Cain…”, the girl murmured, “d-don’t…cry…”, she whispered, raising her hand to touch his cheek.

“Why, Colette?  Why did you do this?”

“Because…the world you fight…for…it can never…be…”

“No!  That is not what I meant!  Why did you allow me to defeat you?  You have always been the better fighter…”

Colette smiled at him, coughing out a laugh.

“Do you…think that…I would strive…to take your life…brother?”

Tears streamed down Cain’s cheeks as he pulled her closer.

“I love you…”, he murmured in her ear.

“As I love you…”, she whispered back, touching her lips to his cheek. “Goodbye…”

As his cries ripped through the night, a wolf’s howl tore through the air.

Author's Note

I'm having writers block! Help?

Reviews

[*~Imperfectly Me~*]

Writers block huh?? God I hate writers block... Well all I can say is if you're an emotional writer find something that pisses you off to the point of you need to write down or you'll explode though sometimes that doesn't help at all and then you do explode. lol.. Writers block is something that happens to everyone whether it's because you have nothing to say or you're too upset to be able to say anything.

This was a good write, I would suggest that you add more imagery into the peice, describe better and not start sentences with He, She, They or It. One could really get involved in this story if you develope the characters more and make them more human with more emotions. But You really have a good start. Maybe rewrite it alittle and then the words will flow...

Hope this helps :)
Kissy, your imperfect vampire

[just is]

Well um! add more to the plot, maybe! just a suggestion, it reads well.
I also agree with the person down below, ad dmore imagery.
You have a wonderful start to your story.
Writers block is horrible isn't it? Been there quite a few times