A Tiny Little Love Story

This is a short story that I had to write for school, but I think it is fairly good so read and review please! Oh, one more thing, out of this story, Sirlev and Jasmyn will not be getting together. They both have someone else. This is just my little fan

Beepbeepbeepbeep…

The annoying sound of my alarm filled my head, immediately forcing me to get out of bed and turn it off.  I looked at the time and groaned.

“7:00…why in the world did she want to meet at 8:00?” I murmured to myself.

I stumbled to the bathroom, took a shower, and dried my hair so that it hung sleek and straight down my back.  I went over to my closet, pulled out a cute white Ralph Lauren sundress and slipped it on.  I then chose a pair of Jimmy Choo white flip flops.  I picked out my Tiffany rhinestone hair band and slid it into my hair.  I was ready.  I took out my cell phone, texted Christina that I was on my way, and walked out to my car.  Just as I was about to go out the fence, something strange happened.  Suddenly, I couldn’t move.  I kept trying to walk, but my legs would not obey me.  Lights swirled around me, getting faster and glowing brighter until I was forced to close my eyes.  I felt myself being lifted into the air very quickly, getting higher and higher.  I really hoped I was dreaming.

Just as suddenly, it was over.  I opened my eyes and looked around.

“Where in the world am I?”

I spun slowly in a circle, my eyes wide, taking in my surroundings.

I was in a beautiful, lush forest.  At the moment, I stood in a clearing that was ringed by huge trees.  The clearing was dotted with wildflowers .  Behind me, was a little, run-down shack that had once been white, but it had faded to yellow.  The sun  shown down, warming me. 

“What a beautiful place…” I whispered.  It seemed as if talking too loudly or moving too fast would ruin the magic.

Just as I was about to walk towards the shack to check it out, I felt something cold and sharp press against my throat.  A strong arm encircled my waist, pinning my arms to my sides.  I was pinned back against someones chest.  I assumed it was a man, unless this female was really flat.  That mystery disappeared when the person behind me spoke in a deep, male voice.

“Who are you that you would wander so carelessly into our camp?”, he murmured into my ear, his cool, sweet-smelling breath sending shivers down my spine.

“I-I…my name is Jasmyn and I didn’t wander in here…I sort of…dropped in!”

I giggled at my own joke, but apparently he didn’t appreciate it because the sharp metal pressed a little harder.

“Tell the truth…no jokes!”, he demanded, his arm tightening even more.

“I did.  I fell from the sky and I have absolutely no idea where I am!”

He let go then and spun me around to face him.

He was tall with a strong jaw, that befitted his handsome face.  He looked like a sturdy, good-natured man.  His green eyes were sharp as the scrutinized me.  His expression relaxed.  Apparently, he liked what he saw there.

“You are not lying and that is good.  If you had lied to me I might have had to kill you.” He smiled, letting me know it was a joke.

I smiled back and his eyes grew serious again.

“Are you an angel?”

I giggled and shook my head.

“No, I’m human.”

“But, you came from the sky…”

I giggled again and shook my head.

“I think it is more specific to say that I came from another world.”

He pondered this for a second and then dropped his hands from my arms.

“Welcome, then!  My name is Sirlev.  I am one of the leaders of the Crimson Guard.  Would you like to accompany me inside?”

I nodded and he took my hand and started to lead me towards the shack.  Suddenly, things took a drastic turn.  I heard something whistling through the air and felt a sharp pain as something pierced my chest.  I screamed and dropped, my free hand clutching at the arrow that had struck me.

“Jasmyn!” Sirlev shouted, his voice full of concern and the anger as he stood up and yelled, “Show yourself!”

A young girl dropped down from one of the lower branches of a tall oak tree.  She laughed as she raised her bow, this time with an arrow pointed at Sirlev.

“Sorry.  I missed.” she said, her voice amused.

Sirlev stepped in front of me and drew his sword, his voice angry as he said. “Then at least let it be a fair fight!”

She laughed and drew her sword, dropping her bow.

“Have it your way!”

I watched as the two of them engaged in a beautiful dance of death.  Their steps, twists, and cuts looked almost as if they had been choreographed.  After about 5 minutes Sirlev slashed her hand, causing her to drop her sword.  She made the mistake of watching it as it skid away.  He tripped her and then held his sword to her throat.

“Yield, and I may spare your life.”

She nodded and he hit her over the head with hilt of his sword, knocking her unconscious.

I felt myself slipping under as Sirlev hurried over to me.  He bent down and carefully slid his arms underneath me and picked me up.

“We will get you all fixed up…”, he murmured, his breath soft against my cheek.

“Yeah…and I get a free ride to bed…”, I whispered back, not quite coherent.

I heard his laugh rumble in his chest and I smiled sleepily.

“Go to sleep.  I will stay by your side.”

I nodded and closed my eyes, drifting off into dreamland.

 

Author's Note

Oh, by the way! Sirlev is not my character! He is my friend Taryn's whom I have borrowed to make this story more compatible with the one me and her are writing. So yeah! Love ya Taryn!
Oh, please keep in mind that I wrote this in an hour so the details may be a bit off and it kinda sucks....but please read it! I'll put up on of my better stories later, so don't give up on me yet!

Reviews

[M. Elizabeth Archer]

A bit choppy in parts, but overall well written, particularly for the given time. The Crimson Guard, however, is from something else, although I cannot remember what. I would recommend changing the name. : .)

Personally, I think that Sirlev was a bit too harsh: it seems as though he would be rather distrusting at first, but certainly not that harsh. Also, I do not think that he would threaten to kill someone unless he knew them and had good reason.

The unnamed girl at the end is interesting, and I would like to know more about her and how she relates to Sirlev. As a previous reviewer said, this would be best as the first installment of several.

[just is]

The plot substained all the way through and the characters remained in balance as well. So I think you have a most wonderful story here. This is a well written.

[Captain Ugly]

I liked it. Liked the charater formation. And the plot was pretty solid. Seems like there should be more. Is it going to be part of a series? Well done.
Just Me.
Captain Ugly.

[Wildecat]

This is a wonderful story, I totally ejoyed reading this and for an hour pretty darn good.