The Burning Plate

Another poem from Creative Writing class. Not entirely sure about the flow of this one.

I see the plate in the fire:

Blackness slowly creeps down its white face.

Then the fire slithers down…

It is trapped; it cannot escape.

My failures, my mistakes, my faults-

They slowly creep down my mind.

They consume me as a fire does a plate;

No refuge can I seem to find…

Author's Note

Constructive criticism, please. I'm always looking for ways to improve my writing. Thanks in advance for the feedback. Jesus loves you <3

Reviews

[ScarletButterfly]

It's interesting to describe the fire as trapped even as it burns something. Like negative thoughts trapped, and how they bring destruction there as well. I hope you find refuge.

[Shiika]

Thanks. Regret is something that I struggle with a lot. And I was actually referring to the plate being trapped in this poem.....guess I should edit this a bit lol

[Whiterose]

The it does seem to refer to the fire, but at the same time its a good poem. A bit concerning, but those feelings can be universal. Take care, and find that place of refuge.

[Shiika]

Lol thanks. And yea I do have a refuge (God). Just need to learn to stop beating myself up over the past

[ScarletButterfly]

I understand that. It's hard to learn to stop. God is indeed our refuge.

[Whiterose]

It is hard to stop hurting ourselves over the past. But hurting ourselves like that is no good.

[ScarletButterfly]

Yeah, it doesn't let us move on and learn from the past like we are supposed to. We get stuck in the past, and even worse, sometimes become afraid to try again because we know we failed once. At least... I experience that a lot. I'm trying to get past that.

[Whiterose]

I experience that a lot myself. I'm just starting to let go of things and other people are what help me do it. They make me realize that I am the only one that put that burden on me, that other people have already forgotten about my past mistakes. Once other people forgive you/ accept you, its easier to do that yourself.

[Shiika]

I agree with both of you.