Clueless Confessions

EDITED

It's quarter to three and I'm sat outside The Yew Cafe, people bustling past as I sit in the shade waiting for Kim to bring out the drinks. I'm not hidden away anywhere but nobody notices I'm here or notices anyone around them as a sag faced woman bumps into a suited man, neither exchanging a 'sorry' as they glare and continue on their ways. Everyone is clueless to what's going on around them, does the woman know that the man's cheating on his wife? That the young country-looking boy she just bought her newspaper from has been in New York for a whole month and not made one friend and that he'll go home tonight, if he even has a home, and phone his parents telling them every thing's alright when underneath he's dying of depression and loneliness but doesn't want to give up?

 

Even so, everyone has their own worries and sad stories, they don't need the hassle of others problems to weigh down their shoulders and so what Kim doesn't know won't hurt her even if everyday it's killing me. Kim sets down the drinks and takes a seat opposite, we sit in silence for a while before she starts talking about the alcoholic her cousin is bringing to the wedding.

 

"And of course Auntie Julie's been on the phone again," Kim continues and I nod along, happy to listen to the constant babbling. "'You've got to do something' she says, 'much too good for him' she repeats and sure it's starting to get annoying but I have to hand it to the woman, Lesley could do a lot better for herself."

 

"Is Lesley the one with the monobrow?"

 

Kim nods and tries to suppress a laugh. "But she's getting it plucked for the wedding thanks to my subtle hinting."

 

"Subtle hinting?! Kim your the least subtle person I know, poor Lesley." I smile and Kim shrugs guiltily, "Nevertheless, with any luck this boyfriend might not like the non-unibrow look and give her the brush-off before the day."

 

"I can but hope," Kim sighs, "At least that's one less kook to worry about, unless you're bringing one along."

 

I sputter my drink at the comment, "Kim, when have you ever seen me with a 'kook'?"

 

Kim appears to think this over for a minute, "Ok, never. But then again you'd have to actually have a boyfriend for him to ever be seen as a kook. And we all know-"

 

"That I don't do boyfriends." I finished for her, rolling my eyes at how frequently this comes up in conversation, especially recently.

 

"Come on, Anya, don't you ever want someone to be there with you for all the ups and downs in life? To have and to hold until death you do part?" Kim laughed lightly, "To be a Romeo to your Juliet? A Patrick Swayze to your Jennifer Grey?"

 

"Well sure it'd be nice but-"

 

"But what?" 

 

"But, I don't want to go through it all again. I don't want all the tragedy and drama of a Romeo; I'm happy now and I want to stay that way." I finished. Kim gave a sigh in defeat and I stirred two sugars into my coffee.

 

"Wait, what do you mean 'again'?" She questioned after a while.

 

"Nothing." I replied, "It's nothing."

 

"You can tell me, Anya." Kim squeezed my hand.

 

Did I really look that anguished that I needed reassuring? Kim's face seemed to agree. Strange, I never knew I was still so affected by it all.

 

"It was nothing really, just a teenage, err, romance."

 

"Go on." 

 

"We were together for a couple years but my family didn't like him." I shrugged.

 

"And is that why you're not together now?"

 

I bit my lip, was I about to tell Kim all about him? Looks that way.

 

I heaved a sigh, "Of course it didn't help that my parents were so against us but that wasn't all that went wrong. Some things were never right in the first place, not for the seriousness of our relationship." Kim gave a confused look and I continued. "We weren't the stereotypical teenagers who said they loved each other without knowing the meaning of the word, we were truly in love with each other but we were still teenagers nonetheless. We argued with each other over the littlest things."

 

"But if you loved each other as much as you say couldn't you have gotten over the arguments?"

 

"We tried and it worked most of the time but my family was about to move away and I couldn't bear leaving him. I was seventeen at the time and begged my family to go without me but they said I was too young, had no say in the matter and so I went with them."

 

"And that was the end of it?" Kim asked.

 

"No, I kept running back to him though my family tried their hardest to stop me and dragged me home each time but when I turned eighteen we decided to run away together for once, to a different country altogether. We didn't have much money at first but we both got jobs and we didn't fight quite as much. We had a house and for once were just living life with one another. Until..." I trailed off, it was all becoming too much, dragging up old memories that were meant to stay in the past.

 

"Until?" Kim pressed further.

 

"Until they found us again. My father wanted to speak to Nari, that was his name, in private and I just remember pacing the floor, waiting for them to come out. When they did my father said simply that my family will always be there for me and waited outside. Then Nari told me to sit down, had something to tell me, said it was important and that I should listen carefully. He said how we weren't right for each other what with all the fighting and everyone being so against us. And then he said... he said that... we should break up, that I should go back with my family where I belong."

 

"But surely you didn't believe him, did you? Your father must have told him to say that."

 

"Well that's what I said, that this wasn't you speaking, it was my father. But then he said he didn't love me anymore."

 

"And did you believe that either?"

 

I looked up at Kim for the first time during my confession and said solemnly, "No, I didn't believe him but I knew that I had to. We couldn't keep living life glancing over our shoulders every five seconds. So, I packed as much as I could fit into a suitcase and left with my father."

 

"And that was it?"

 

I nodded, "That was it, the last I saw of him."

 

"How terrible," Kim shook her head, "I never realized that was why..."

 

"Why I don't do boyfriends you mean?" I smiled weakly, "Well, boyfriends aren't quite so bad I guess, it's husbands I can't handle. Not anymore."

Author's Note

Updated yay! The start of the full rewrite, some details have changed but still the basic plot just hopefully better written.....
Anyway please review, would really like to know people's thoughts!

Reviews

[-Aurelia Mirella]

Oh my gosh! This is insanely good!...my favorite chapter so far!

You've really got me caught up in this story. I'm always eager to read more!

Wonderful job!

Always,
-Aurelia Mirella

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ok..this gave me goosebumbs... i cannot wait for it to continue... though i guess the choice of words could have been better... still this captured me.. casted a spell on me..and is surely right in the favourites list :)

a treat reading your work...
take care...
niki..:)