Never Wear A Crown

To all you pretty young girls out there

Who remind me of what I once was:

I don't often give out free advice,

But every little girl growing into

A woman's body made for destroying a man's decency

And a face built for innocence and sin

Should know never to wear a crown.

It's a terrible burden to bear,

And one that causes corruption and obsession.

A crown is heavier than it looks

And the weight begins to bears down,

Bringing false power with it.

Men will want that power,

And they'll break you for it.

Don't wear a crown,

Or you'll lose yourself.

Wear a helmet made not of iron and steel,

But something light like lithium.

A metal, a drug, a cure-all.

You girls will battle your way through hordes of men

Looking to steal everything you are,

You girls will cut through them 

With swords made of your burning will.

Never wear a crown.

Reviews

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Wow! Me too in brutal, Boudica's armour as men are again trampled under the wheels and tarred with the same brush. A flowing piece full of invective against the male of the species.

[Dave]

As the father of two young women I appreciate your advice to them. Even in today's "enlightened" world women still have to be wary of those men who would prey upon them, to take advantage of their innate goodness. Thank you for you write.

Take care - Dave

[LazerRays]

Wow this is wisdom at it's finest! There is a time where crowns become heavy and burden us like prey for the men to grab at. So put up the crown and grab that helmet as you say; this is war not admiration time! Wonderful poem with great meaning! I love it!

[BlackPrince]

This poem is good to advise girls to prepare for the big world out there. I have four young sisters, so I very much agree. But, of course, there are loads of good men out there who are truly sincere and loving.
Though I must admit that modern society puts so much emphasis on sex and nakedness that it seems so hard to escape.

'You girls will battle your way through hordes of men
looking to steal everything you are;
you girls will cut through them
with swords made of your burning will.'

What a picture! What a metaphor!
The above verse has such an apocalyptic imagery!

The poem is clear and concise in its message and intention.
But, as a poetic friendly suggestion, I can see this poem using rhymes,
'NEVER WEAR A CROWN' being the beginning phrase and as refrain occurring 2 or 3 times throughout the stanzas (6 lines per stanza) and being the ending phrase (as you already have done).
And the core message will still be the same.

With the experienced voice of one who has seen the dangers, and now shouting in the desert, on the street corners... Let's assume you begin like this:
Never wear a crown, pretty young girls out there!
How you remind me of who I once was!
I don't often give out free advice
but I sacrificed a heavy price in love.

These are just ideas.

Because this poem can be a powerful anthem, a survival guide.

WELL DONE

[Askew]

I'm very happy you liked this message so much, and that you could relate it to your sisters. I also appreciate your suggestion for editing the flow of my poem, but I wrote it this way for a reason and I intend to keep it this way.
I have very strong feelings about how young girls should be treated and how they should grow up, and I'm happy so many people share those same views.

[BlackPrince]

I totally agree with your freedom of expression. The poem will forever be wonderful and powerful.

[Mr. Mills]

You really have a talent. It's really inspirational to all women. It's good for men to because they totally need to know there place. I give this 100 out of 100. You're so good in poetry!

[Askew]

I don't think it's really about men needing to know their place, so much as they should know to respect women and not put them on a pedestal. Thank you for this Mr. Mills, I love knowing that my writing is getting such great reviews.

[Carthage Thorne| The Wi..]

This piece is wonderful advice, and I feel should be something shared to all young peers but even for parents too who would think to teach their children, particularly their daughters about presenting themselves in such a manner.

The concept you have portrayed, is highly encouraging, especially seeing it from this side (as a guy) because it shows again, that woman MUST be properly treated, respected, and seen beyond their image. Another slam-poetry/mic drop piece if I ever saw one. Ever seen those inspirational videos on youtube? With the orchestral dubstep-music playing behind an inspirational speaker... that's what this piece makes me think of, a prime piece for your female audience but also a really good example that allows men to also understand and know their place.

~CarthageThorne

[Askew]

It makes me so happy to see men receiving such a positive message from my writing, I didn't expect such an great response from men like you. Thank you for this.

[Carthage Thorne| The Wildcard]

You really are one of those inspirational writers, I think that's why I've enjoyed reading your works so much is because it is something always to think on and ponder, learn, grow and mature from as well.

[Chris Shaw]

When I read the word crown in the context of your lines, I thought princesses. I do not approve of parents who spoil their daughters and raise them as princesses. I say raise them to know they are equals capable of doing or being anyone they want to be. I like the idea of wearing a helmet. Soldiers, fireman, construction workers do. All career pathways suitable for women. That's where your lines took me Lexi and I enjoyed that. Powerful write.

Chris

[Askew]

That was exactly my intention Chris, so thank you for seeing it that way.

[Chris Shaw]

Pleased I caught your drift. Break the glass ceiling girls, that's what I say :)

[trying_to_write]

I like the harshness of this, the kind of reality slap of what the world has become. Very well written.

[Askew]

I'm really glad you liked this, I've had this idea in my head for ages and only just found the right inspiration to write it down.