Circle

an attempt to write a serious poem..

A rain hawk circles in the dawn.

The dawn uncovers the trees ;

the trees lead to a forest.

The forest sinks into the damp earth ;

the damp earth waters the stones.

Stones are under a rain hawk -

a rain hawk circles in the dawn

a rain hawk circles in the dawn.

Reviews

[Clockwork]

It is strange, I have a sense of deja vu about this poem. I feel as though the image of the rain hawk has circled in my mind before. Maybe that is because the hawk is one of my favorite animals overall.

I like how you string your images together. Each has a place, and each of them builds upon the other.

my favorite bit:

The forest sinks into the damp earth ;
the damp earth waters the stones.
Stones are under a rain hawk -

This stayed with me long after reading finished. I liked it quite a bit.

[Dinali Sathma]

nice... poetic... shows how everything interconnects

[quinfinn]

this goes much deeper than meets the eye, and i wish i were privy to your innermost thoughts when writing this...but i will settle for having read your elegant and sensitive prose. c'est magnifique!

[Valentine]

Very nice..I love seeing the wild birds and animals we have in the country where I live..Valentine

[Sacha Davison]

This was a good read. Keep up the good work.

[Mary]

a very lovely progression of nature; I especially love "damp earth waters the stones"

[Frieda P]

This made me smile, it's grand in it's simplicity and message. Nice read.

[Sami Khalil]

A good write . Thank you for sharing.

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

I like it... the circle of life happens for a reason.