4 Elements

I guess this is the most simple poem i've ever written. It just surprised me because it came to me one day and I just kept writing it.. Thought its content is short and may prove meaningless to you, I hope you enjoy it anyways ^^

 

As mellow as a cloud
As loud as a roar
As gentle as a shroud
As strong as an oar: Water

As bright as the sun
As dark as the haze
As sweet as some hon-ey
As hot as a blaze: Fire

As soft as the wind
As rough as a storm
As mellow as a melody
As swift as a thorn: Air

As vivid as life
As dead as a tree
A place you call home
A place to be free: Earth

 

Author's Note

It doesn't really matter to me, but please be truthful and thorough ^^

Reviews

[Sagar Patil]

A separate poem could be very aptly composed taking each element into account. I had once written a poem combining the elements. Its subject matter was entirely different though. Here it goes:

"Wish I could just become the weightless air,
And drift on breeze into your ambiance,
Spread good vibes while you breath my love in there,
Being unbeknownst of its pure presence.

Nay? ... Then let me become the waves of sound,
And ride on air and perch on your ear's nest,
Then dulcet tunes in them let me abound-
Express essence of my life, while you rest.

If not, then let me be the water bead,
And rise from seas, above, mid thunder's voice,
Then float with clouds until there is a need,
To pour on your face; tell you 'bout surreal joys.

Else 'least a flame in your fireplace mid grate,
Few moments brighten on your beauteous face,
Not being deserving enough, blame Lords of Fate.
Before I vanish into nothingness.

If your Love - fire, water, air or sound,
I cant be; then just merge me with the ground."




Your poem is very well writ. Kudos. :):)

[Adarsh]

Awesome one there. I really liked this one. Meaningless you say? No no.
I especially loved the last stanza. This poem reflected simplicity at it's best.

Quote:
"Never overlook the power of simplicity." :)

Good work. :)

[azlamalo]

This definitely expresses elements! well done

[M.S Solis]

your words really expressed the elements
i ilked it! great write!

[Butterflymom]

Fresh, fun, and creative!! Very enjoyable read.

[Devilyn]

I really like it! How each of the elements has its own part and how you brought in visuals with the coloring =)

[theunknownchick]

Awesome!! Luv-it

[Octob3r Star]

Very Spiritual, Love It!

[deeps]

This is really wonderful
I like how you added the colors to signify the imagery.
Well said and written. enjoyed.

[Donovan "Grey Wolf" Go..]

wow its really good, It shows the differences between the eliments but alsow the differences in power of each eliment. Fire is always the best.lol.