Ramshackle Army

Ramshackle Army 

With nowhere to run and no place to go 
We oozed out of the hills in ragged groups 
A ramshackle army, not frontline warriors 
Our weapons blunt and in need of repair 
As we looked down on the mass of enemy 
Our line weak and rough as we faced them 
We entered into the battle so reluctantly 

Into the valley of no return 

Then suddenly you came smiling at death 
With your careless proclamative broad strokes 
Riding a fine horse and wearing silver armour 
With your long sword of steel shining high 
Your men behind you on their stallions 
That kicked up sods and clods of earth 
The hooves causing a thunderous roar 

On the field of blood 

Never had I been more pleased to hear 
The ring of steel as my world went black 
As I became defeated and overwhelmed 
Beaten and bloodied, pushed to the ground 
Later I found out that we had won the day 
We had turned things around by a whisker 
Because you had made a death defying run 

When all seemed lost 

                    © 2014 Leigh Green

Reviews

[Stanley Wilson]

oooh good work the battle in my mind loved it

[TL Boehm]

unexpected ending in a finely constructed poem - a different twist to the warrior, the knight, the battle. Well penned.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

A good tale indeed Leigh with a good outcome for some. Told in a bold set of descritive stanzas. Is this based on a particular battle?

[Leigh]

no not any battle in particular, just something from my imagination.

[Coyote Poetry]

Remind me of a Civil war battle description. So many deaths and both sides took credit for victory. The poem had the feel of realness and confusion. War is confusion. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Leigh]

You are always very welcome

[The Black Warrior]

I truly loved this poem, very intense and powerful.

I enjoyed it! ;)

[Leigh]

Thank you for looking in and your comment Suk

[The Black Warrior]

You are very welcome Leigh Green!

[Aethereal]

This poem grabs the reader, and places him into the fray along with one of the bravest of the brave. Sometimes it only takes one warrior to change the tide of battle as more reluctant warriors follow. Reminds me of Joan of Arc who defeated the English at Orleans in 1429, and she was only a teenager. Brave people died on both sides in their mutual quest to serve their king and country. War's a sad affair. It was always bad news for their horses when medieval warriors fought.

[Leigh]

Your comment has added something to my poem, thank you

[Konigin]

I love it! I felt like I was in a battle and that this was me! I loved the part:

Then suddenly you came smiling at death
With your careless proclamative broad strokes
Riding a fine horse and wearing silver armour
With your long sword of steel shining high

Great read! Keep on writing! :)

[Leigh]

That worked then :-) that is so nice to hear

[Ruth]

Such intensity...I am always in awe when I read you...no other word for it x

[Leigh]

Thank you Poppy, 'I've been out of touch lately/ busy writing. Thank you

[Shaquana Adams]

I really liked the ending to this one. I enjoyed :)

[Leigh]

Yes I try to stay upbeat