~ True Love ~

 

 

 Tr.u.e. L.o.v.e.

 ‘Bridges’ yet crossed - or even burned

 

That afternoon in autumn,

 

 the Sun began releasing ‘Her Tears of Hope’,

 

 Standing there embracing,

 

looking up, as a light mist caressed our faces…

 

True Love, Indeed… the strongest, matched by no other

Lost in attraction, steady ones breath, are you listening?

Interpersonal love, shaped of elements of fallacy -

Spawns the birth, now borne of Love or Infatuation?

 

Jane Doe: “When we talk, you're always attentive to everything”

John Doe: “I Love how you cook, clean and treat me like a King”

 

Love begins of innocence, nothing short of harmless

Craving sense of mystery, passing boundaries, no expectations

Desire to please; you do not want to possess…

Engulfed in Flames of shadowed passions, your heart at rest!

 

Jane Doe: “You used to dive in, exploring my shores”

John Doe: “You appreciated, respected my Love. Now…you Expect so-much-more.”

 

Choices made, perceptions viewed, push to shove…

Could you spend your life, 24 hours a day with the one you Love?

Can Love last forever…? What do we 'choose' to sacrifice…? Exactly…  

Explore the nature, understanding the function of Love.

 

Jane Doe: “Ashamed I am, concealing pain with silent cries �" you never cared”

John Doe: “You thrive on mind games of torment and despair”

 

Pain vibrates, shattered dreams, crossing lines of gray

Tomorrow, soon will deliver an 'envelope of dismay'

Rhythm of dance, life once treasured, now lost forever…

To each left scars, unseen, chiseled within their soul...

 

Jane Doe: “I guess you never really loved me at all!”

John Doe: “Go ahead and take another picture off the wall!”

 

 

 

On first glance, Love (First Love, for the second time, third or so-on)

We believe this is {True Love}…

 

Is this possible?

Do we have an idea of their favorite color, number, T.V. show and/or what makes them (tick)?

No~… We seem to judge the visible aspects such as appearance, smell, things outwardly that pulls us in.

 

Can Love really be defined?  Does True Love ever fail us?

 Are 'We' willing to work through differences together? (Not by looking in front of 'Us')

 We seem to exclude ourselves �" that’s right… This is a one-way-street, right…?

Love...in all facets -

A development of ‘who we are'...Want to ‘be’...What we can ‘do/be’ for others…

SILENT PROMISE 'ONCE MADE', LEFT DROWNING IN A SOUR GLASS OF WINE... 

Does True Love 'Ever Die'...?

  

 ~Legacy

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Reviews

[Tania Leigh]

A unique format made this fun to read.....the stanzas in red, to me, are like a narrator speaking his piece, and then his voice fades away in time for the vignettes of dialogue.

I can easily see this acted out on a stage with spot lighting alternating between Jane & John Doe and the narrator, who is off to the side.

A wonderfully insightful write about the cycles of love and human relationships.

[Sherri Olivera]

I like it. You get a bit cynical towars the end. Do you know anyone that has lasted with the complete package of love, commitment, and intimacy?

[Kaden Sylvers]

wow, I have to say, the diction is trully beautiful and your idea is eloquently expressed with metaphors and what-not. I don't necesarily agree that all love is like that, though, but a lot of people do get trapped into relationships like that that they really don't want to be in.

[livemorbidia]

I agree with Tania

[Taj Sonchai]

I like the poem. Are you looking for artistic feedback or philosophical feedback?

Artistically it's great, philosophically you present only one experience.

[Cupcake]

This was so wonderful....and it really does get close to reality...

[Jane Wadeley]

very interesting and experimental format, which i liked - but i think the John and Jane Doe couplets (while being a good idea) are a little too simple - could do with more depth, greater development. And the use of apostrophes confused me...
rich in ideas and images.

[Ryan Pierce]

A nice marriage of poetry and story. I've never seen anything like it (although, admittedly, I'm much more of a short fiction writer/reader than a poetry one). What could be interesting is if you could perform this on stage, that would literally "bring it to life", as you said in the message you sent out. I like the format, and what you had to say. I like how you present these things without really telling us what to think, leaving it to the reader to answer the questions for themselves. It could be a bit tighter (there seem to be one too many narratives at work; the red narration and the dialogue are the heart of the piece, while the gray pro- and epilogues seem a tad unnecessary). My favorite line is the next to last, "SILENT PROMISE 'ONCE MADE', LEFT DROWNING IN A SOUR GLASS OF WINE..." That was an excellent summation of everything that came before it.

[Marquise]

what a format!!.. hmmm.. I can relate, but I also can see where you were going with john and jane doe..

[SpiderPumpkin]

Personally, I can't really relate to this situation and I am wondering why Jane and John's relationship deteriorates like that. Which makes me worry because I am actually in the stage one of the relationship.. the happy and new love feeling. Plus, it being my first love experince doesn't help either!

But it seems to be more like a married couple because Joe is treated like a king and Jane is doing the cooking and cleaning.. like the typical old-fashioned marriage. So I'm wondering a little if Jane and John got married too quickly.

After pondering awhile, I conclude that must have been the case they married too quickly without getting to know each other first. I also have this feeling that I am too young and inexperinced to grasp the full concept of the poem. But I think it's about deterioriting relationships and changing ourselves to get along well with your loved one.

But I like the progress of the relationship though. It sure gave me a fright at first reading though! I thought it was some apocolyptic message to my own relationship. Haha. Now that I spent so much time rereading it.. I feel that I now understand what you intend to convey, and yes now I find myself nodding to it.

[Leo TheSaint]

The Astonishing format of poem I had to read in numbers of ways tying to put story together.
its good.