What Was Our Love?

It was a look from across the room-

When Someone says something and I thought of him.

He wasn't thinking of me, was he?

It was still apologizing-

Months after a fight.

Was it only me that cared?

It was holding his cold hands-

Because I was afraid he was going to drift away.

He did.

It was a kiss on the side of the head-

Because he wanted you to know he was still there.

I believe now it was a lie.

It was being apart from him-

But always near him.

I guess I wasn't close enough.

It was listening to a song-

And seeing the lyrics roll off his tongue,

Even if he wasn't there.

He wasn't really I suppose.

It was being held when you cry-

Because my life was falling apart.

Where is he now?

It was laughing-

Even when the joke wasn’t even that funny.

Was any of it real?

 

It was holding on to something raw and fragile.

It was silly faces and awkward jokes.

It was never-ending stupidity wrapped in serenity.

It was beautiful, careless, flawed.

 

It was something that destroyed me in viscous ways.