I love you with nothing left but a soul

She will watch over him

I stare at the window with its icy windowsill
 The icicles dripping with the melting ice

He looks at me with that smile about to kill
To kill the heart of a broken one

I'm already doomed with the fate of a broken heart
No more of the flowers will bloom.

I cry for his love
The love of a one
Who cares for all the ones doomed

Please help me my love and rescue me
From this curse of a life

Don't run away or fight me,
For I just want you to know

As I die slowly from my faulty heart,
I will love your whole soul and mind

This love song I wish to sing to you
Will make you want to come and find

The joy of a woman with the love of a heart
A love that will never fail

I will rest with the angels from today
And watch over you with a gentle smile

I love you with nothing left but a soul
Not a warm heart anymore

Remember me oh my love
Don't forget this, don't close the door

My passion for you, my kindful mind
I love you with nothing left but a soul

Author's Note

Review? What do you think of this sad love story I wrote?

Reviews

[MomzillaNC]

Beautiful sentiments mostly, but it reads almost like a suicide note.

[sinNsincerity]

This is so beautiful. I really enjoyed this one.

[The Tea Party Mouse.]

A wonderful sentiment. Love does not end at death! Beautiful.

[Matthew Walters]

Hmmm very emotional, I feel the tone and langue which a lot of writers and young poets have trouble with is clearly in sync with each other. The piece is moving and sad and not to Emo to the point that the dark sadness becomes overblown (Insert Sasuke joke here) also I like how you arrange your letters and font size so there not to small but then again not MASSIVELY HUGE so to make it seem grander then it is and cause the bigger words to draw more attention then the others. The words themselves seem to keep in rhyme with each other and each word keeps itself within a letter range of two to six letters so one word doesn't stand out over the others and thus seem to be more in tune with each other (That my personal opinion) I say I give this a full 99/100 while it isn't very long (Again that not really a huge draw back) I really feel it shortness work in its favor and prevent it from dragging on.

I really enjoyed it Chain of Hearts!

[dan]

Leanna, This one digs really deep into a reader's heart and kick starts it for the show. It seems as if the writer (you or your muse) is saying she is dead, no warm heart anymore, but my soul is still very active. In my opinion, if all one has left is their soul, then the soul will get one through anything. This is a very beautiful piece. There are a few glaring mistakes I saw. Write me back if you want me to tell you. I'll be nice. take care...dan

[Chain of Hearts]

OK...what?

[dan]

Now the poem is great, really nice wordplay, but you should try to avoid repeating yourself. In the first two lines of the poem you mention ICE three different ways, ice icy and icicles...you do a few other minor repetitions, UNLESS you mean to do it that way, then that's good. You write really well, Leanna, and I have to tell you that you to not let this bother you. I want to see you writing more on WC, so I hope you don't mind giving me more read reviews. take care...dan

[wordman]

this s a beautiful song,and a dedication of your love

[Chain of Hearts]

Its not about me (I don't think I'd be able to be on Writers Cafe if I was in heaven LOL) but its just a story of a woman's sad love story

[wordman]

good point,don`t you have a contest to finish up lol

[Chain of Hearts]

Which one?

[wordman]

the last two that I didn`t win

[Chain of Hearts]

what???? What are they called

[Chain of Hearts]

like, what are the contests called

[wordman]

don`t remember they was for jan I think

[Chain of Hearts]

oh was it the poetry or touching story one

[wordman]

powerful poetry beautiful poetry don`t see winners