Writers...

We surrender our souls

to ink blotched pages.

Rendering our yesterdays down,

distilling their essential essence,

so that they might survive

Tomorrow and Tomorrow and Tomorrow…

 

We share of ourselves,

alone with all humanity.

A part and apart.

Watching and Writing and Waiting…

To be forgotten, unknown, unheard,

it is the ferocious fear

that freezes our feeble hearts. 

Author's Note

What do you think? Is it accurate? How could it be better?

Reviews

[Augustus]

This is an exceedingly adroit portrayal of a writer's mind. Very judicious and appropriate use of figures of speech. The opening line is beautiful and immediately grabs the reader's attention with its impact. I like the repetition of the word "Tomorrow". In the second stanza, "A part and apart" is an absolute gem. Not only for the clever wordplay but for the truth in it as well. Some very effective use of alliteration at the end.

Overall, this poem has two parts. The first stanza is about HOPE. The second stanza is about FEAR. And the dichotomy probably paints an accurate picture for most writers. Of course, there must be many writers out there who write for entirely different reasons and so any generalization like the one you have made in this problem is likely not universal. However, I do believe it covers the majority. As such, I think this is a very succinct, skillful and striking poem with wonderful balance and consistency. The work of a seasoned campaigner. Well done!

[LawrenceRaybon]

Thanks for the review! The Tomorrows were actually borrowed from Shakespeare, the line was meant to have a double meaning. The tomorrows set up this way obviously portray the hope that the writing will survive into the future, but by referencing Shakespeare (arguably one of the most well remembered writers of all time) I was trying to imply that the hope wasn't just for survival but the kind of cultural dissemination that Shakespeare has achieved.

As for the universality, I realized this didn't cover everyone and I briefly considered a stanza about writing as a way to make a living/fortune, but I felt like it cheapened the rest of the poem. I believe, as you do, that the poem does, at least in some small way, covers a majority of writers, and thus hopefully stands on it's own.

Thank you for the glowing review, and for taking the time to explain why you liked the piece!

[Augustus]

You're welcome! I didn't know about the Shakespeare reference so thanks for enlightening me. I think you were very wise not to include a stanza about writing to make a fortune. It would have destroyed the balance of the poem, at least in my humble opinion. It is excellent as it stands. Pleasure to review it!

[Yeti//R.E.Strayer]

I think this is absolutely beautiful! The only thing I would say to maybe change would be the line "tomorrow, tomorrow. tomorrow" for some reason it just did not seem to fit as you have so many other beautiful lines in here. My favorite line is "Alone with all humanity/A part and apart" that is wonderful! Keep it up!!

[Brittany Zedalis]

I really enjoyed reading this. I love it just the way it is, so I can't really offer any suggestions. Really great work.

[Guvi]

awesome lines .. :)
you may have added how a simple pen becomes the most powerful weapon when held by a writer's creative hand :)

[Guvi]

nice lines .. :)
you may have added how a simple pen becomes the most powerful weapon when is held by a writer's creative hand.

[SquinklaPsyOps]

I like the the continuos flow of easy to read style.

[Aethereal]

Your poem seems to be a combination of Shakespeare and the movie "High Noon". “our yesterdays”, “tomorrow & tomorrow & tomorrow” “ … “Oh don’t forget me oh my darling …” sung to a heart beat rhythm during the movie.

As for me, I don’t care if I’m forgotten just so long as the art of poetry in all of its forms isn’t forgotten ...
“so long as men can breathe, or eyes can see…”
so long lives this, and this give life to thee.” ( Sonnet XVIII )