It Should Be Christmas

This came as a whim to me. I really miss my brothers and I want to spend the holiday with them but I doubt it'll happen. Family conflicts are so, conflicting.....

It's that time of year again, 
Christmas is fast approaching,
The holiday sales are everywhere,
The Thanksgiving turkey is still being used in last minuet lunches and dinners 
And Families are coming together
The tinsel and lights are going up
Trees are being chopped
And the inside is warm and toasty 
The fire burns softly, It's glow lighting your heart ,
Families come together, 
Closing the gap of the year, 
But not here
There is no fire, 
Hell, there is no heat for the house
The family is broken from the head on down,
Christmas is just another excuse to waste money that is being wasted elsewhere.
My heart should be filled with joy,
I should be in the kitchen baking to my hearts content
My brothers should be lounged around the living room
Twin finishing his game
King publishing his work
And Bugger drawing 
Together we should be having dinner
Decorating the tree
Lights here, our personal ornaments there,
The star at the top, shining as bright as our love
Underneath a number of gifts hand picked, some handcrafted, 
We should be unable to sleep with anticipation
We should be telling stories to one another, sharing secrets like brothers do,
So much should be happening, 
and yet, 
I am in this shamble of a house, 
No where near being a home
My heart is breaking in the worse way possible
And my family stretched far and thin....