III. We are the lost generation

High school is a survival test where each seeks to be the best.

(11 individual poems)

1. We are the lost generation

We are the lost generation
The lost generation

Anxiously searching for Best
and no rest
Constantly doubting, we’re kept
Under arrest

With no dream and no Faith
But a thirst to be Great

Taken away
Shaken but standing
Confidently faking

A laughing tear, we ache
under the load
And wake
From three AM colds

Au revoir!
How our hearts whisper
Collectively together

Away, we dream
To be gone
Till we’re lost no more
And found

2.  Many restless a night I had

Many restless a night I had
Staying up late for homework and tests
For winning a cup
Beating some kid from another school

Or just lying there thinking
Of tragedies and Caesar and my future
I think too much perhaps
And they call it some sleep disorder

But why should I stop
For what are thoughts for
Except the making of a life

Less cacophonous than your own?

3. Is there a function that can describe

Is there a function that can describe
The feelings that I derive
From Sunday fits to 4 AM cries

It’s a Conspiracy against the human
reason, to fall back asleep in
Such a season,

I don’t know what resides
Inside. A thing that loiters in the night
Looting for the fruit of treason

It’s a good night, after all
Tomorrow I won’t be alive, no doubt
’Tis just me being crazy, or not.

4. Your face, distorted

Your face, distorted
Your laughter, marred
I try to grasp
The essence of me
Return to me beginning
Beneath the sea
Listen to the wide calm
Of the deep
(I wasted yet another hour
Of gentle sleep )

5.  And silent is the night

And silent is the night
Silent is the clock licking away my life
But silence is me.

Everything chants in unison
All except my own heart beats. They bang,
They clash, they dance an twirl in 
Cacophony.

I don’t sleep cuz I’m not fit to be. So I must
enter deep. This has nothing to do with
Them--they don’t know
 
The music. That’s the resistance in me.

6.  Anyone here to hear me screaming

Anyone here to hear me screaming
About nothing at all?
Nonexistent days on far-away planets
Scary flights toward
Nothingness, the congested inter-
membrane space of tomorrow?

No one? Fine.
I just wish to prove I am still sane on the
way to the brighter age, preparing for the
upcoming
Challenge. On the road to the intensive
fake.

7. ‘Cause what do you expect me to do, leaving me here alone?

What else can you expect me to do
Leaving me here alone
Except that Slowly

My self consciousness erodes
Sinking beneath
That deep layer of myth

Hanging
Between heaven
And the bottom pit
I smile and see
A shining angel
In a devil’s small mischief

You’re surprised
At my self destructive art
But please

Tell me

What else am I supposed to do
As a wandering soul
And an escapee?

8. Tick

He smiles in half- parted lips.
One half in confidence. The other,
Ignorance.

Eyes mingle. Necks turn.
Bottles get flipped. Humans,
tricked.

In a hoodwink, his smile
Becomes a sneer.
Tick.

9.  Next

Dashing around the corner
Of the clock-- I make haste
To the next stop
Where all the mess confronts merry souls
And music dancers
Mean what they confess.

10.  Prayer room

Inside a room, the orange light
Sparkles , and spirits soar

Just outside , the stairs lay empty -
I swallow hard, stomach sore

The orange light covers all prayers
In a radiant bubble, but the moonlight discovers

the lonely child, and mourns it
With a piercing white.

11. Plastic

Plastic people
Plastic love
Plastic phone case
Plastic dove

I’d like to know
What I still got
You look like there’s nothing
Left to say -- ‘cause it’s
Plastic too.

Good- night
Lovers fight
Blue and yellow peeling off the
Cell phone light.
So it’s true. I miss the candles
Moon cakes, heart-shaped
Handles.

Old stuff that’s not plastic.
So they can’t be
Fake.
Or can they?