Confession in a sin.

Her sin has brought her to a world of not believing.

 

She deeply believed in her heart that there was a high power, at the core of the universe, it had purity, and it was enternal. 

Jenn sat in her room and meditated at all the thoughts she had going through her mind whether or not she believed. She had been dating a active member who actually wasn't true to his values, and nor has she been. Layered in her heart she knew what she had done, that had been defacing her values, and she fought that fact that it was so wrong.. She knew what she had did with him, and every moment of everytime her values were brought up the image appeared. Her hand slowly traveling down to his pants, and slowlying grabbing what was supposed to be untouchable until marriage. He groaned at the touch and let her continue, as he passionatly went back at her.

 

She's been a memeber of the church for quite sometime. Yet she has not revealed to the bishop what has happend or how progressively strong this sin has gotten. Instead she became inactive, and decided doing that wasn't a problem. Disreguarding the sin. She continued. That's-- well how it all happend.

 

It was a sunday morning, and she woke up knowingly it was time for some change. The rain had poured all morning long, and she was ready to realized that it was time to wash away her sins. She took a step outside, and went for a walk. Each time in her head she pushed hard for forgiveness. It was time to let go.

 

Each time she thought of going to church, or drove by a church a sense of fear filled her heart up entirely. She trembled with fear. Afraid to face it. It was as if god took his hand and put his hand on her shoulder saying everytime it woudl be okay to go back. He woudl welcome her with open arms, and tears would flow from his eyes every time she cried. She felt the pressure.

 

This probably had to be an upliftting moment but she didn't take it that way. She fought it. "why me, why is it so wrong" but what she had done was taking part of the forbidden fruit into her life. The devil had taken control and given her thoughts of negativity. She couldnt do it. Sitting in her room, it was time to end the relationship or stop the sin. Soon enough the once loving realtionship that had finally lasted a year had came to its end. Which made her sin worsen as the thought came. " You only do those types of thiings with those you love, charish your kisses, and your love" Pfft-- What love she thought--one mistake could do so much emotional damage. You'd never even think.

 

 

She flipped through her scriptures slowly trying to take in every word that meant something to her sin-- She came across one that literally got her tears flowing. "Come now, andlet us reason together, saith the Lord: though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be white as snow; though they be red like drimson they shall be as wool" It was time for repentence, and she found herself awake most of the night praying for forgiveness through Christ. Half crying and half whimpering. She would go to church the next following sunday.

 

The sunday finally made its way, and she was ready. Something awoke her in the moment of truth to get herself back on the road to recovery.

 

It had been sometime she had partaken the sacrament, and it washed her clean. It felt as if she had renewed her values, and set aside the sin she had taken action with.

 

That wasnt the end. It was tiem for a confession after a few sundays of going. Would she--or even could she was the question in this matter.

 

She had gained a testimony through a long lost friend, and became stronger with each day. Because god had put that friend into her life, as a best friend, a sister, and guide right by her side. Not only did she have the holy spirit but she was given a friend that could help her as well.

 

maybe--just maybe confessing wouldnt' be the hardest thing in her life. Yet she wouldn't have to if she could just feel the forgiveness through prayer. 

Time will tell whether or not Jenn makes her way to the right road. :)