Darwin and Lilly

Darwin and Lilly

naive and harmless

bright eyed and eager

to start too soon

this will last forever

alter egos 

here to face the world together

once young children

grown to love one another

eyes locked once

body was yours for the taking

might as well have handed it to you on a platter

those gentle hands left me shaking

forever lasted thousands of days

too good to be true is real

ill never be me again

my Darwin is now a burn that wont heal

never to be this dumb again

Lilly learned to keep guard

that knight and shining armor

made breathing for her too hard

the ache will never fade

searing harder throughout the day

its not fair falling so deeply

for the knight that didn't stay 

Reviews

[Woody]

very beautifully penned. you have such a way with words. I believe that there are many fake knights in shining arours out there.

[Woody]

beautiful!! I'm spellbound.

[Laur]

thank you love :)

[Sugar Plum ♥]

I liked the feeling of this poem, even so hurt there is no regret or need for revenge, but pure acknowledge of of the wounds. I dont know is there is a real story (involving Ch. Darwin) here, but I sense the personal and intimate story..which has deep roots. When we give all precious we have for the man we love...yes it`s really not fair to love the man, who can`t feel the same deep love for us. But this unfair love occurs always with the sensitive heart...Very nice piece.

{nia}

[Laur]

Oh goodness, thank you SO much. I really did wanna portray that sort of feel in this poem so I am so glad you understood it. Your comments are truly wonderful :)

[Sugar Plum ♥]

Thank you too, dear! :) I`m happy to read your poems!

[Tomorrowneverknows]

It's a really beautiful poem about love and her deep heartbreak with and the cadence is beautifully adorned with allusions to the shining armor. The medieval knight and the lady.

I feel in my heart of hearts especially these verses:

"forever lasted thousand of days
too good to be true is real
ill never be me again
my Darwin is now a burn that wont heal"

Maybe because I lost thousand of days in my life looking for illusions to find disappointments
now in these moments I feel a deep burn and I answer if someday will heal...

It is certainly disheartening.

Your poem is just wonderful Lauren

Jesus

[Laur]

what a wonderful review! thank you sooo much :) I'm gad you truly captured what I was trying to portray. you have wonderful english by the way! what are you talking about!

[Tomorrowneverknows]

Lauren thanks for your comment. You made my day and I'm glad to be your friend. Jesus

[John Ryan]

I could really feel the emotion in this piece of writing. Good Job

[Laur]

thank you so much!

[ANM]

Could feel the hurt well written very impactive,

[Laur]

thank you!

[ANM]

You are most welcome!

[Meraki]

The way.. you have talent. Now reading your work it, excuse me if I'm out of line I apologize, seems as if it's more of a diary. Your writing it's great I'm fond of the way you're able capture the emotions of love or and heartache into words.

[Laur]

not sure if that is good or bad but i just write how i feel at the moment, thanks for reading it :)

[A. Amos]

Each word perfectly describes the romance... I admire your skills. 

[Laur]

thank you so much :) i admire yours!

[A. Amos]

You're most welcome