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This is a rewrite of a previous poem.

Why didn't I visit my mother in the hospital?

when I got the call?

 I was stalled. But you've 
been there many times already.
I know it sounds mean and petty
 My life situations put me in a box with
no aid to me not even from the clocks.
I couldn't come see you -
I don't think I wanted to.
The question now is…Why?
I can't say its because I didn't want to say goodbye
that's not hard for me do...Besides, I hardly even know you.

I won’t even cry besides I know it’s not your time.
Looking back on how we started every conversation with remember 
that time…I don’t want to remember. You forgot me!

Now,
I feel so detached
I feel mismatched
I need a patch to medicate my heart
I already have love  someone please give me empathy
make a path for me to feel my emotions

I live daily with so much, so much internal commotion
I need to feel.
It’s like I'm living in a glass bubble floating high

With needles as the sky, I am about to burst at any minute

Life is a gimmick.