Is Anybody There?

Bewildered and forgotten

No one seems to care

Alone I sit while asking

Is anybody there?

Growing old was not my fault

Nor was it in my plans

I followed the path life gave me

Just like time demands

Discarded like a memory

That's no longer of any use

Rejected and neglected

My age is no excuse

No one comes to visit me

It's like I don't exist

They think I can't remember

So, I'm silently dismissed

Solitary confinement

What am I being punished for?

You tell me that you love me

But don't visit me anymore

No one to tell my troubles to

Or to talk about the past

A prisoner of my loneliness

How much longer can it last?

Banned from all existence

By the wrinkles on my face

One day soon, you'll feel my pain

For you will take my place

Reviews

[Robbie~xoxo~]

So true about life...growing old seems to be a solitary confinement.(If you allow it to be.)
The expression of loneliness is weaved nicely into the rhythmic flow of this piece. Great write!

[David O Whalen (O Haol..]

I'm already where you're at and have been there for quite some time Whiskurz! You express very well the emotions that we're all going to experience sooner or later, but as long as you can write like you do you'll never be alone or forgotten, trust me! I'm old, probably older than you, but to date I have over a quarter million hits on various sites and hope to have a half million before I kick off and I don't feel lonely! So, Whiskurz, you'll never want for company just as long as you keep writing your outstandingly fine poetry for the world to enjoy. (incidentally you might want to change "prisioner" to "prisoner" You're a hell of a writer Whisk! Appreciate Ya!

[Michael G.]

Very well written and very well thought through. While a sad commentary of society, you wrote of this problem very well indeed.

[Lucia]

I really love how you address what sometimes happens to people as they age. I am currently reading, Water For Elephants, and the main protagonist addresses a similar point that you bring up here. Each stanza is extremely powerful in putting your point across. I cannot pick a favorite because each has such a strong message. I really loved "Growing old was not my fault/Nor was it in my plans". Age is one of the things in life that we cannot control. It comes whether we want it to or not, and there is no way to stop it. This has a very sad feel to it as well, and it makes my heart ache to think of an older man or woman sitting beside a window, watching and waiting for someone to acknowledge them once more. Great work!

[Shimmerbliss/CAF]

I got goosebumps from that last stanza! This is a meaningful and sadly beautiful write. It is such a shame that this is so often the case. So much wisdom is unappreciated if we shy away from a "wrinkled" face.

[just is]

Yes very powerful indeed, very nicely said

[Owlgirl]

Wow, powerful and emotion filled with a great rhyme scheme and smooth flow. I captures the reader adn holds them in sorrow through the lest word of the last line. You may want to add some puntuation, but it doesn't really need it because the poem is already super awesome.

[EileenMarie]

Very powerful! That is great!