The Liar and the Thief

I lied when I said I didn't care

Before you walked away

And when I told you, "Don't come back"

I wanted you to stay

When I said I didn't love you

The pain was on your face

I said it wasn't meant to be

I said I needed space

I told you I didn't need you

You hung your head and cried

I want you to know it wasn't true

I'm sorry that I lied

You stole my heart the day we met

And you never gave it back

And all the good you have inside

Is all the good I lack

You've taken all I had to give

You left my heart a void

Between us both we can't turn back

Our love has been destroyed

You're better than me, you always were

And though this love was brief

I'll never forget the love we had

The liar and the thief

Reviews

[December Blaize]

First off, congratulations on winning 1st place in my contest! I really enjoyed reading this... they rhyming is wonderful, and it flows really well. It resonated within me, because I've felt the pain in your words. It is a disastrously beautiful poem, and I love the title/last line... "the liar and the thief"... it's got a great ring to it, speaks volumes.

[Jem Sagcal]

Oh, this was simply wonderful. I can feel the hurt that was being shown in this poem. The sadness here can bring anyone to tears and to reminisce a similar experience of their own. Truly wonderful.

[Whiskurz]

Thank you my friend.....Whisk

[PurpleQuartz]

...that was so good I think I'm going to cry...

[Whiskurz]

Thank you my friend.....Whisk

[Cara]

Awwww, I totally feel what you feel it hurts soo deep to lie at the one you love, like truly love
Great write

[Whiskurz]

Thank you my friend.....Whisk

[Cara]

anytime ;)
cara aka sidra

[Krista Weiss]

Wow! I can't even begin to express how much I love this poem!! Such a great job!! :)

[Whiskurz]

Thank you my friend.....Whisk

[Ama May Cooper]

A sweet but saddening tale. There is nothing more admirable though than those that can admit hat despite the love its best to let them go. I thought this was a lovely piece very emotive and i love the whole liar and the thief idea and the representation of the indaviduals involved fits perfectly. Lovely rhythm all the way through the words just flow of your tounge all the way to the end.

[Whiskurz]

Thank you my friend.....Whisk

[Dalia]

I can't describe in words how joyed I feel after reading each and every single one of your poems sir !
this one is one of my favorites, you just said it all.
Brilliant :D

[Whiskurz]

Thank you my friend for your too kind comments.....Whisk

[Dalia]

welcome :)

[Ashley G.]

This. Is. Amazing. I love how you wrote this and really wish I could write things this great. I enjoy reading all of your writings. Keep it up. =3

[Whiskurz]

Thank you Ashley.....Whisk

[Lino Rie]

Your poem was amazing no wonder you won first place. A remarkable read.

[Whiskurz]

Thank you my friend.....Whisk

[Lino Rie]

Your most certainly welcome.

[Persona]

This is great because it's very simple and powerful. I love the effectiveness and how relatable it can be to people's lives! I think this is excellent and well crafted with a rhyme scheme that work effectively and efficiently without being forced. The flow is fantastic and it all blends together smoothly. I like the idea of a back story and a history to the poem, that it's more than one moment in time but a retrospective look and a regretful feeling toward how things were.

[Whiskurz]

Thanks again my friend.....Whisk

[Persona]

You're welcome. More people really should see this!

[dawn aulis]

Loved it, flows beautifully.

[Whiskurz]

Thank you my friend.....Whisk