My world

This is not a poem or a story.

just my thoughts,

my inner demons,

things I cannot express to those close to me face to face.

As I breath, 

My lungs begin to bear their weight.

The air seems to escape me

and my breathe becomes shallower.

Cancer is a world not many have dared to look at.

But it's there.

Whether we want it there or not.

Children, 

Family,

Friends,

Anyone, anyway can fall prey to the silent killer.

And the cure,

Will either cure you while killing you,

or kill you all together.

There is hardly an in-between.

When you're told your best friend is "deteriorating" 

What else are you to expect other than the worst possible case.

Friends and family try to give sage advice,

wisdom,

but no matter what is said,

there is no helping this all-consuming grief.

Tears fill my days,

and worry is my comfort.

Worry for her,

and worry for myself.

worry for all those around me who are ignorant to the horrors these diseases can bring.

I've lived the life of a 30 year old twice over in my short 19 years.

Yet when I speak my piece,

I'm brushed off and told I have not yet experienced life,

That I'll understand the world more when I'm older.

Well,

Some of us never get to be older.

Some of us only get the years we are given.

And some of us learn a few things along the way.

Yet when a child,

who has had cancer,

has wisdom to share,

they are still only seen as poor innocent souls.

We,

They,

are not "poor innocent souls"

They are warriors who fight battles everyday.

Battles that no one else could ever imagine. 

Battles that we continue to fight,

even after the war has been won.

Because even though we have won the war,

There is always a chance for another shoe to drop.

Another friend to relapse,

another loved one to lose.

Many take life for granted.

But we,

We take life day by day

Because we never know when the next one may be our last. 

The harsh reality is,

In the end, We need those who love us more than we will ever need things

because in the end, we will all leave this earth somehow.

If I've offended I'm sorry.

However the world is a cruel place for those who have to fight everyday.

You never know who could get diagnosed next. 

It's something no one ever forgets.