What if

"Hold on to me as you go,  hold on to the scent of the rain and the color of sunrise, the sand in your shoes and the first time you met me, hold on to this as you lye awake, hold on to my watch so you can make time stop, hold on to the song you've always wanted to write and with this umbrella follow your wet feet to where we first met and don't wait for me just keep going and this time hold on to life."

 

The first time I read it I knew what he was, a color you can't define, a color you can't wash off no matter how hard you try a trace will always remain.

And sometimes you discover a new place in your room where you can lay your head back on the wall and see yourself in the mirror with all the colors of you and all the colors he left you and once you see the world in color it can't be undone although black and white are like air, like colors he was worth it and maybe colors like these are meant to fade leaving you a trace to create with because they don't belong here, they belong in a heart-shaped locket hidden in a drawer in a house on the hill or on a stamp that has traveled the world in search of love. But life won' t tell him that somewhere out there there's a dusty box with all the letters she never sent, life wont tell him that she fears mirrors because she might see him in her eyes and her wet feet can't seem to leave the place where they first met.

 

And why would he stay when she's the wave he can posses, the wave that wants to be possessed and when she stirs his coffee she loses herself in another wave that seems to carry her somewhere else, and when she looks in his eyes she can't get out, she's trapped in him and when she paints there's always a part of him there. Why would he stay when she was created in his imagination.

 

Why would he stay when he fell in love with the girl with the suitcase, perhaps with the suitcase itself. But he waited at the door because the possibility that life could be in there scared him, it scared him that he could actually fly away like the song he hummed when he first laid eyes on her, it scared him that he may never touch ground again so he decided to walk her to the end of the horizon and watch her fly away like a dream he once dreamt and at a point when all her traces fade away he will wonder if she did exist or was she another song that he let fly away.

But some things just remain in the back of your mind and only visit when it's silent when you're neither awake nor asleep and they tell you "What if?"

 

 

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

A amazing story. The what ifs of a life leave us wishing for better beginnings and happy endings. I like her internal thoughts and questions.
" And sometimes you discover a new place in your room where you can lay your head back on the wall and see yourself in the mirror with all the colors of you and all the colors he left you and once you see the world in color it can't be undone although black and white are like air, like colors he was worth it and maybe colors like these are meant to fade leaving you a trace to create with because they don't belong here, they belong in a heart-shaped locket hidden in a drawer in a house on the hill or on a stamp that has traveled the world in search of love."
The above lines are amazing. You are a talented writer. Thank you for sharing the amazing story.
Coyote

[Lamis]

I am very honored by this! turely and deeply honored. Thank you :)

[InsanityWriter]

Beautiful. :) You've conveyed so many feelings, and established a relationship between these two characters in this piece very well.
Great work!! I enjoy reading your writings. :)

[Lamis]

:) Your reviews are always very sweet and encouraging, I really appreciate this!

[K. Louis]

First of all--I loved reading this. It coincides with a lot of recent thoughts i've had about illusionary reality.
I just really love the way you ramble on in your stories; there's an expansiveness in your writing, that is like trying to tread the sun setting horizon. It's quite a nice thing to read because of the layers.

That first paragraph was exquisite. The rhythm and flow really worked for me. I also really loved the 'follow your wet feet' line that you touched on a second time later in the story.

I really found it interesting how you kind of switched roles between the two characters...the reader gets a glimpse into her head and his head and it's kind of all mixed up in between hypothetical pauses...because she is this and he is that and both can never be they...but if only..

yes, thought provoking read! Well done Lamees!

[Lamis]

K. Louis, I love how you get me and the way you describe my writing is exactly how I wanted it to be described :) A comment like that makes me feel like I got what I came here for, I got someone to see through me. Thank you!!

[K. Louis]

No problem...always a pleasure!