Just a Small Town Girl...

Chapter 1 - In which we meet Harmony.

This skirt is too long. I feel like a librarian. What is my hair doing? Ugh, I should have tied it up. Oh no... here he comes! Act natural!

Harmony White snapped her compact shut, tucked it into the hot-pink handbag slung casually over her shoulder (but not too casually, you see!) and rounded the corner of the classroom block. Expensive high-heels clacked against the asphalt, and her hips swayed like the limbs of a peach tree in a summer breeze.

James was no more than fifty feet away now, walking towards her. He was alone - his friends had all turned in to the classroom block for fifth period algebra, but he was heading to his music lesson. This was the perfect moment she had been waiting for.

Harmony's crisp white blouse had the top two buttons undone. She had debated with herself extensively this morning, posing and preening before her bedroom mirror, whether to undo the second one. She wanted to draw his eye, obviously, but would two seem too lascivious? She had eventually talked herself into it, and made sure that the frill of her black lacy bra was peaking oh-so-slightly over her shirt collar. A plain black belt was cinched high on her hips - she had decided that this gave her ensemble a more elegant, refined look, and her lipstick had been applied with the care and precision of a surgeon performing a heart transplant.

Twenty feet now. Her mind was racing. She was so close she could see his chestnut hair rippling slightly in the breeze, count the squares on his flannel shirt, smell the fragrance of his skin...

She had planned the location to a tee. She was walking into the wind, with her head held at just the right angle for the breeze to catch her hair, tossing it back like something from a shampoo commercial. Fifteen feet now... it was time! Come on girl, don't mess this up!

She flashed him a winning smile (not too big, you freak! keep it subtle! like we practiced! Don't show too many teeth!) and fluttered her eyelashes. Twice was the key number. Once made you look surprised, thrice was tacky. Two quick flutters - flick, flick, and you were golden. As they drew level she raised her right hand from her hip and gave him a little wave with her fingertips whilst mouthing the word "hi!", hoping that this conveyed her intended appearance of delighted recognition. This hadn't been part of the plan - an impromptu, spur-of-the-moment addition to the routine - but it seemed to go down well.

James smiled, nodded, kept walking.

She caught a whiff of his aftershave as they passed. She bit her lip to stop a small moan.

They had passed now. She had kept her cool. She let out the breath she had pent up for the last (how long? a minute? an hour? an eternity?!) and sighed. 

You did it, Harmony. Great job! He'll be thinking about you now! 

She gave in to the temptation to look back over her shoulder. He was twenty feet away again, hands in his jean pockets. Then suddenly, he looked back over his own shoulder. He caught her gaze. He grinned.

Harmony's heart caught in her throat. It was then that the ultimate catastrophe hit - the Hindenburg of flirting. With her head turned to look at him, and her hips still swaying with each step like a runway model, her ankle twisted. She lurched. Stumbled. Tripped. 

Author's Note

Let me know if you think this is worth continuing!! Please be honest!!

Reviews

[Mikayla_Stagg]

This seems great so far. The text is a little big and the chapter is sort of short but i liked it. Its realistic. Most authors wouldn't have written that she tripped because they would want it to be perfect, but you did which was realistic and make me laugh a little which was great. Keep writing :)

[Lady Annabella]

Haha thank you!! :)

[Jake Donald Stephens]

She should just be HERSELF!!
I love the way you wrote this. So many great descriptive sentences! It really flows perfectly. I would love to read more.

[Lady Annabella]

Thank you so much! I really appreciate that :) Next chapter will hopefully be up some time today!

[jjwilbourne]

This was really cool. I loved how it ended. I sort of expected something to go wrong and hoped it would land. Looks like that landing was more of a faceplant.

[Lady Annabella]

Haha thank you! :)

[Leo M. Zeac]

This chapter seems quite promising. Harmony's personality is very clear, and your attention to detail shows nicely in certain places. However, I think the usage of "yards" is a bit calculative, and Harmony seems more like a "feet" girl. Also, Harmony's inner thoughts are a big necessity, but the way you implement them with parenthesis is a bit confusing. I've had plenty of trouble with inner dialogue myself, but there are some amazing articles online that could really help you with this! I hope you continue this chapter soon!

[Lady Annabella]

Thank you so much for taking the time to read and review! You're so right about what you've said haha, I've taken it all into account :)
I've already fixed the yards/feet issue, although I liked the calculative aspect since it shows how precisely she'd planned this moment and was overanalyzing everything :P. I'll also work on implementing my inner monologues a bit more fluidly :)

- Love, Annabelle