The Heart of Death

You there…
…Yes you…
Standing there…
…In loves soft embrace…
Feeling safe and at home…
…You are blind…
You will never be safe…
…And you are far from home…
Why should you be loved…
…When others better then you are not…
What makes you so special…
…That you are loved…
Unattractive…
…Fat and ugly…
Stink of chicken fat and smoke…
…Face full of p***y spots and zits…
Ragged hair and cracked lips…
…Why are you loved…
Why do you feel safe…
…While others like you are out on the streets…
Scared to fall asleep at night…
…Frightened of being mugged or rapped…
Or even killed…
…But then why fear death…
After all it comes to every one…
…Loved or not loved…
Bow your forehead to deaths kiss…
…Embrace pain and hatred…
And now look at your love…
…Out of work…
Out of pocket…
…In the hospital…
Laying on the bed…
…Hooked up to this and that…
All sweaty and fat…
…Why would anyone love that!
Breathing slow and in a haze…
…Lost in a black illusion…
Of what life and love might have been…
…Now stuck in a dead end job…
No house…
…No money…
Childless…
…Hopeless…
Empty…
…Heaven has closed it doors…
Down and down you fall…
…Lost in the thick of it…
The misery of life…
…Voices speak…
They told you what to do…
…All the voices in your head…
Never happy…
…Wishing you were dead…
Standing at you lovers grave…
…Rainfalls down like bullets…
In a battle zone…
…Not really caring…
Never will love kiss you again…
…Upon lovers heart…
You place a single rose…
…A symbol of all you gave…
And of what you’re going through…
…And with that rose…
You lay your heart…
…Leave it there to die…
But the pain will not stop…
…Your scream of hatred…
And a love now lost…
…So loud and sorrowful…
Could wake up the dead…
…Your heart has stopped…
And has now turned bronze…
…A fine trophy to be won…
Weeds and nettles grow in your chest…
…Cover the hole where you soul had once flown…
Now you are lost forever…
…Looking at the ring on your finger…
Thinking…
…About only one thing…
Hating it more then anything…
…One question is all you shall ever ask…

WHY DID GOD EVER CURSE ME WITH LOVE?

Reviews

[Queen of the Damned]

This is very deep. I love it.....especailly this part....
�Not really caring�
Never will love kiss you again�
�Upon lovers heart�
You place a single rose�
�A symbol of all you gave�
And of what you're going through�
�And with that rose�
You lay your heart�
�Leave it there to die�
It brings very vivid images. Great job!

[*Kantola*]

This is an extremely deep poem. I was mesmerized by the words. It had a wonderful flow to it, and one of my favorite subjects: "Why do we love?" This was an extremely beautiful piece that was well alliterated. Fantastic job, Xena!

[Lexy]

You did a very good job with this. Especially with the imagery. Congrats on lowering my self-esteem!!! :) (I'm joking, of course.) Two thumbs up!!!!!!

[Chiquita]

I have been here and done this. I have stepped from the comfy bliss of love into the questioning of God as to how I could have be cursed to love. Yet here I am again in the throws of new love. I am hoping for something better this go around.

I found this real and believable. I wish I had something more creative to say at the moment but fatigue is holding me tight.

I found the way you play off one's insecurities very powerful. You take the reader out of love and into the pit of I don't think I am worthy, and it can't last. Then you drop them into the regretting of the entire ordeal. The pen you hold is a powerful tool.

[Chelsea Schermerhorn]

Very nice anti-love poem. I like the concept, if not the mood of the poem. It is a fine piece. Thank you for entering the Any and All Poetry Contest. You have made it into the first cut of finalists.

[E. M. Murren]

Wow... starkly real. Painful. I sit in awe of this fine work. This feels like a release at the same time. Truly lovely poem. Your style and the structure in which you placed your thoughts are perfect. Really wonderful piece.

[Blackbirdsong]

There is a rawness here that is almost exhilerating, however it needs to be polished and checked for typos. For instance I think you probably don't mean "p***y" when describing zits or acne. I'm not sure that there is a word "puss-y" but the other one that you used gives a whole different meaning than zits.

Also it's "raped," not "rapped," drums are rapped, people are raped...well I guess you could rap a person if you tapped them on the head or something. :)

[Marie]

Nice job.

[The Elder Pine]

All I can say is wow what a wolloping write this one was. The emotion is powerful and raw, and written into the lines very well. I like the breaks leading into the lines, I think they give an effect much like that of a whisper as if someone were whispering these lines from beneath the grave. This piece was also packed with vivid imagry and descriptions that are mindblowing and that come togther to form an amazing piece. Very good work.

I must appologize for quoting your entire piece and reposting it here, but I am compelled to point out the wonderful work you have done here.

"You there�
�Yes you�
Standing there�
�In loves soft embrace�
Feeling safe and at home�
�You are blind�
You will never be safe�
�And you are far from home�
Why should you be loved�
�When others better then you are not�
What makes you so special�
�That you are loved�
Unattractive�
�Fat and ugly�
Stink of chicken fat and smoke�
�Face full of p***y spots and zits�
Ragged hair and cracked lips�
�Why are you loved�
Why do you feel safe�
�While others like you are out on the streets�
Scared to fall asleep at night�
�Frightened of being mugged or rapped�
Or even killed�
�But then why fear death�
After all it comes to every one�
�Loved or not loved�
Bow your forehead to deaths kiss�
�Embrace pain and hatred�
And now look at your love�
�Out of work�
Out of pocket�
�In the hospital�
Laying on the bed�
�Hooked up to this and that�
All sweaty and fat�
�Why would anyone love that!
Breathing slow and in a haze�
�Lost in a black illusion�
Of what life and love might have been�
�Now stuck in a dead end job�
No house�
�No money�
Childless�
�Hopeless�
Empty�
�Heaven has closed it doors�
Down and down you fall�
�Lost in the thick of it�
The misery of life�
�Voices speak�
They told you what to do�
�All the voices in your head�
Never happy�
�Wishing you were dead�
Standing at you lovers grave�
�Rainfalls down like bullets�
In a battle zone�
�Not really caring�
Never will love kiss you again�
�Upon lovers heart�
You place a single rose�
�A symbol of all you gave�
And of what you're going through�
�And with that rose�
You lay your heart�
�Leave it there to die�
But the pain will not stop�
�Your scream of hatred�
And a love now lost�
�So loud and sorrowful�
Could wake up the dead�
�Your heart has stopped�
And has now turned bronze�
�A fine trophy to be won�
Weeds and nettles grow in your chest�
�Cover the hole where you soul had once flown�
Now you are lost forever�
�Looking at the ring on your finger�
Thinking�
�About only one thing�
Hating it more then anything�
�One question is all you shall ever ask�

WHY DID GOD EVER CURSE ME WITH LOVE?

I felt that the opening was almost poe like, it reminded me of the ravens message and I thought of the raven delivering this poem as I myself was reading it. The images at the begining are wonderful and catching, and they continue through the whole piece. There, I'm done my tangent. Thank you for sharing and indulging me as I went on my little rant.

[Kevin Andros]

The first two lines are written in such a manner that one has the illusions that someone is there talking to me. I had that, anyway. You there........yes you......... and I skipped a heart beat like "now what did I do?" Lolzzzzz. Very nice and lively composition. Keep this thing up! ~KA~