Burn Out

A revision of a previously published poem, in syllabic form

Flint to stone, creates the spark
Flick of hope, to light the dark
Grow a torch, from powdered ash
A fruitless...and futile task
Strike the stone, to no avail
Embers die, the damp prevails
Flame-less spark, no fuels ignite
A portrait of Loves' still-life

Reviews

[Mark]

The couplet is such an ideal form to express these feelings, based in fear and futility, but yet not without hope: "Grow a torch from powdered ash..."--burned, but ready to flame again!

[Rossen]

Poignant and easy to connect with...

[Winslow Des Totes]

Wow, really terrific use of diction!! Awesome write!

[Audrey Howitt]

A wonderful portrait of love's still-life. Beautifully written . . .

[Robin]

a portrait of survival

[fargone]

a poem of hard sharp images, LA Lorena. obviously, the lack of spark is the crux. i guess we have to look far to find the right kind of fuel to catch fire. a good write, my friend.

[FJ Davis]

Could just as easily apply to one's blocked writing as to a dead love.
Finding a new love is often the solution to both these problems. (Good luck with forcing that into any convenient time frame.)
Still, this revamped piece is quite successfully woven on your poet's loom of gloom. It is very fine work, LA.

[Allen Smuckler]

Your splendid use of metaphors...throughout this poem.. created the most unusual images and made it come alive with vibrancy albeit painfully.
Terrific write, LA in a short but precise way...
I really liked it
allen

[SpokenWord]

You know while I was reading this I thought about survivor for some reason how they could never light a fire, that too along with your poem reminds me of how people just don't know how to ignite love and keep the fire burning with it. Great symbols in this!

[NoneOfYourBusiness akaK..]

Love the chant like spellbinding quality~ soecerous! =)~