Another Late Night Full Of Questions...

Asking questions with no definate answer...

I just can't stop thinking, So looks like another late night for me.

Perhaps having an early mid-life crisis, visualizing imagined destinies.

It used to be that I thought of the past, ever present, unrelenting.

Though lately it been thoughts of the future, and even after my eventual ending.

I've always been like this I guess, those who know me would say it's true.

Asking the questions with no definate answer, like "who the hell am I?.. who!?"

"Am I just a combination of merely blood, bone and flesh?"

That wouldn't create the untangible feelings like love, hate and stress.

It's seems to me that my body, like a fork, is merely just an extension.

My body to me, like a fork to your hand, is just another helpful invention.

Or am I just my conscience?, that familiar voice I can hear in my head?

Which begs the question: Is it freed or destroyed after the physical body is dead?

Question leading to question, without hope of an answer in sight.

These are the thoughts that trouble me, and seem to keep me up at night.

I'm going to keep on digging, looking at my entirety as never before.

Searching for a satisfing answer, deeper and ever deeper I must explore.

Assuming I am not at first, only what I can physically touch or see.

So it must be in the immaterial world, that I can only exist or be.

"Immaterialism"... Something that doesn't really exist.

Maybe what I'm percieving is the illusion? I could always cut my wrist.

Okay... so i'm not as conviced to test this, not in that kinda way.

Perhaps I'm both physical and immaterial in a symbiotic way.

One needing the other, to seemingly flourish and exist.

Two parts to a whole, but I'm only one! you know what!!! f**k this!!!!

I guess I'll just jump on the bandwagon,.. place my trust in only blind faith.

Get on my knees nightly praying, and asking God for a heavenly place.

It's gotta exist right? either God or some omnipotent equivalent.

A real true Deity God, Jehovah, Allah, Creator, it's name honestly irrelevant.

Again another question... Why is there anything at all?

Was this Diety just lonely? suffering from a company withdrawl?

Perhaps it just wanted someone to appreciate it's grand creations.

Though we're too busy making money, worshiping selves and destroying foreign nations.

It's getting late now... and I've failed to answer even one of these questions.

Feeling too tired to keep a clear train of thought, due to too much mental ingestion.

Who am I?,.. I am human, curious, scared, and without answers.

Left here to die with nothing but questions... eating at me like a cancer.

 

Good Night...

Author's Note

Reply's Welcomed :)