Give Lola A Kiss For Me

A parting request...

 

I had watched her only yesterday,

Taking for granted the sight of her heaven pleasing smile

While shaking my head at her adorable but most ridiculous dance;

Pretending to ignore her mild tantrums at being chuckled at

Yet having my heart melt upon viewing her pout at a glance.

I had watched her only yesterday…but that was a long time ago.

 

Today was the future my childhood nightmares warned me about,

Where the moon turned black because I viewed it through my heart

Where your mistrust would experience a growth spurt and rip my mature-

-but very gentle, loyalty apart.

Today was the day I wished tomorrows never came.

Today was, and I was its victim---

And now Lola will never know why I went missing.

 

Would it have been too much to let me say goodbye?

To let me wipe the tears I know my pain has dropped in her eyes?

There’s nothing worse than me having to bear this curse-

Why add to its weight?

Since everything is all I’ve lost, why do you insist on taking from the nothing I have left?

Please tell me.

You don’t want to be held to account and yet you owe me,

You owe me all that made you worth anything.

Do you really imagine hurling me out is ingenious?

That if I’m deceased in your fantasies, in reality it will serve that purpose?

Well I’ll tell you that you’re wrong.

You’re rejecting me doesn’t mean I’m leaving-

Not unless she does…permanently.

Now with her every gesture and glance,

With her words and by her stance,

You’ll know you never got rid of me;

And I will know that you know---and I will dance.

I will dance as I live in the grave you have banished me to,

For that is life without her and without you.

 

This is the tale that has turned my sweet heart bitter

That has filled my mouth with bile,

Torn my sanity to rag piles…

The tale that makes me want to die.

Listen to it and then to me bring the answer-

-Of what I am to do without Lola.

 

I am made to pay for the wickedness of another

My suffering impregnates me with hatred and death

But also with a thing that lives.

This is what I’ve been killed for,

The life of my life’s stopper.

You would believe nothing I have confessed

-of course you would!

How I am yet to play the adulteress

In this tragic play which depicts me as the villain,

When in truth, I am the sole victim.

I wish you would listen.

But then, you have no ears tonight.

You have no heart either;

You’re made of rough hands,

Cutting words and curses,

And unthinkable demands.

Our entire story’s chapter

Is demoted to nothing by your fury injected verses.

Husband, where is my Lola?

 

But there was a form I didn’t see

Hanging back in the shadows as my heart’s throb disowned me

Slight in figure, soaked with tears---

The little angel God let me have for four years.

Her soft little sobs were refused carriage on the already tense air,

The love mingled with pain I failed to hear.

I’m at a loss what to do as I’ve been refused passage-

With the hate blocking your eardrums, I doubt you’d pass any message.

Still with everything else you’ve done wrong, which is all of everything,

Just do me this last good: every day from the moment I leave your sight-

Always give Lola, from me, a kiss goodnight.

Reviews

[Eddie Phillips]

All I can say is wow. I was swept away into this poem and the sense of loss and indignation. You expressed a sincere hurt and betrayal. People hate and turn away but they can still hear our crys. I heard yours in this poem. Outstanding job.

[Kwiksie Ifediora]

Many thank yous Eddie! I really appreciate your thoughtful reviews.
Blessings! :)