a coat, not hers

A coats, not hers

( a poetry that begins at the words I have stolen with permission from the master writer K.c.Klein)

A coat, not hers wraps the little body

Crouched it twists down the alley of slumber.

The girl sleeps on the night-bridge forever.

Spotless sun rises over her and stooped

To wipe out the last of the murky night

Out of a soul that should not be touched with

Slightest of the dimness it lives within,

The days in and days out. Ha, the measures

Men invent to bind slipping time and space!

She stirs and steps out of the tattered coat

And binds of time to reach for a life of us.

 

Reviews

[Carrie Montgomery]

"Ha, the measures

Men invent to bind slipping time and space"
yes man tends to try and tame the world and the mystery of "us" with such insignifigant things as time and fences called space.
"A coat, not hers " this calls to mind how children and future generations may have to wear "coats" not their own...dealing with the past generations and the carelessness we have shown...
another poem that causes the reader to think and wonder...

[lori c]

i feel this is one of your best. the images pulled at my heart strings and i just wanted to scoop up this girl and bring her home.
Spotless sun rises over her and stooped

To wipe out the last of the murky night

Out of a soul that should not be touched with

Slightest of the dimness it lives within,

my favorite lines. so many child souls i encounter that should not be touched with this dimness. fantastic write.

[Just Manoosh]

You set the scene with such clarity honey.

Great descriptives, beautifully done.

Mx

[Cece]

love the metaphors of the sun
brighten the day
doing away with the night
ended the sleep for the dawn
the dawn not for just a new day

do you just love peeps
trying to tell you what you meant
isnt that why you wrote it
to make me think and ponder

bravo i'm thinking

[Beautifully Tragic xPoe..]

Very intense piece. Another great write, with some great lines.

[Bhavya Kaushik]

Beautiful write, very much vivid and intense in it's own way!

"To wipe out the last of the murky night
Out of a soul that should not be touched with"- I loved these lines the most!

Very well penned and a powerful write indeed!! :)

[Touché Armada]

Lovely, this feel like a walk in a park in ones own world in the middle of a mad city running on stress hormones.. I just think there should be a word alteration here in brackets for flow.. Just my thought though or reading tecnique perhaps.. As always a pleasure to read you.


To wipe out the last of the murky night
Out of a soul that should not be touched with
Slightest (slights) of the dimness it lives within,
The days in and days out. Ha, the measures
Men invent to bind slipping time and space!

[alternative_be]

Here you find both the images we have of the homeless: the romantic side and the realistic side: day in and day out she steps out of this coat, but deep inside would not she like to have a so called 'normal' life. Reading this poem, all these questions arise.
How is she? How did she get there? Will she ever get out? Does she want to get out?
Very deep ...

[Emily B]

This is beautiful. Amazing stuff.

[Kasey Klein]

Hello my friend.

The story can be read at: Iphigenia. The link you have above doesn't work.

I am honor by your labors and words. Nicely done.

[Alexzan Marie]

Beautiful. I say that a lot, don't I? oh my...

It really is, though....

'She stirs and steps out of the tattered coat

And binds of time to reach for a life of us.'

Brilliant.

Vivid.

I just love your work.