her stories untold

 

Her stories untold

 

Very nearly love.

She has told.

Anger erupts a volcanic scream,

He breaks down,

Goes moon

Only for a limited time.

Then the eternal healer comes.

 He never understands.

 

“It was very nearly love”

: Was all she could have told

She could not tell

Why she had to sell

A story like that.

The eyes at first were

At war with truths and beliefs,

Now they are only sarcastic.

There shall remain

Gaps and void spaces between the stories

It is

Only near to truth.

Reviews

[justjenn_2u]

A poem about a legacy that will never be figured out. Goes moon, intriguing. He breaks down, the moon is alone, and always seems to just be there. Nearly love, how bittersweet. This poem is universal, definately could have different and varied interpretations.

[lizzie]

I really like this...I agree that the beginning and end were perfectly aligned.

[poddar kushal]

thank you all

[Carrie Montgomery]

"Very nearly love...Only near to truth." the beginning and end are too perfectly equal.
"He never understands" - how many people have felt that no one REALLY understands them?? Your poems are so easily related to, you are remarkable.

[Touché Armada]

I think you sum almost every writer there is, it only very nearly truth.. And of coarse can we even define a dream as truth? If not then a vast majority of us are selling stories that are wholly fictional.
I like the tone and the story telling in this piece, enjoyable write. Thank you.

[Emily B]

I like the way the lines break. Stellar work.

[The Archangel Gabriel]

I like it a whole lot, but perhaps you could explain to me "goes moon" as well. For me, the best part was the indentation of a few lines. That really makes them stand out and gain attention. Plus, it adds interest.

My favorite line is:

"Then the eternal healer comes."

Praised be he or she who heals in a world ripe with hurt!

Wonderful write.

-Gabe

[Bhavya Kaushik]

This is a very unique piece!!
damn interesting...
with a great symbolic idea..
overall..an awesome read..
keep writing!

[CarrieLynn {Chameleon A..]

stunning piece... your writing style seems reminiscent of Pablo Neruda's. Great Job! :)

[George Love]

Interesting idea and form. I like it, but please explain Goes moon for a little while?? Not sure I got that.