Typed directly into the text. Inspired by the song and the fact that there's a thunderstorm happening as I'm typing this. And the image gives me the creeps.
Constructive criticism welcomed! :D
My Review
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maybe I should not be reading a poem about rain sitting out on this sticky,bug buzzing deck,he traps you in a corner or is it the rain? Or is it just a micro-burst like in my poem Soul? Reading this makes me feel selfish ,I just want to share my own emotions .What can you gain as a writer ? I like the shortness, I would like it have a edge of "raw",descriptor "salt",Anvil ,thumb, pulsing sick to your belly fear.I will grant you lose the shortness when you add the description,Some one else can buy "Great Value" I want to know the tick - tock, lump in your throat,tears stopping you cold as the tree fell across your road thoughts that made you feel creepy.
I'm not sure if I read your comment right. This poem was suppose to be about paranoia. For me, I get.. read moreI'm not sure if I read your comment right. This poem was suppose to be about paranoia. For me, I get more freaked out over something that has little explanation, smaller but noticeable details more than all-out fear. You know, less is more. For other people, the level of fear is different. However, these are my thoughts and your comment expresses your thoughts, and that's perfectly fine.
Hi there! My name is Kris.
Any reviews that I get I always read and take into consideration even if I don't reply.
If you have any constructive criticism, please do so.
I am open to sugges.. more..