Ice Cream and Beat-Downs

Nero thinks on his feet and provides a public service....

Ice Cream and Beat-Downs

I

Bayside welcomed the spring season with open arms. This colorful array of civilization went about their daily lives within the four robust districts. As usual, the market district near the bay of Bayside was by far the busiest. The stalls were filled with chatter that morning, though a multitude of conversations revolved around one thing:

“Who’s that human chasing after a bear-folk?…”

“I’m not going back to prison!” the bulky denizen bellowed, huffing and puffing his way by the diverse market stalls lined along the streets. He toppled down various stalls as they raced by vendors, trying to slow down the mercenary not far behind.

Being the pale type of human, Nero’s face resembled that of the tomatoes being sold in the market bazaar, winded but determined. He imagined his paycheck was stuffed somewhere on this targets awful track runner outfit. Maybe even stuffed somewhere behind that smelly white sweatband bound around the bear-folks forehead.

“Stop….. RUNNING!” Nero panted, feeling the weight of his ballistic vest bouncing as he hurried. If he would have known there would have been this much running involved, Nero would have happily risked not taking it with him. In his hands was a pistol, keeping the barrel pointed to the cobblestone and his finger off the trigger. Though tempted, Nero knew better. With the payout the job offered, Nero couldn’t risk a shot to the leg. The woman who had hired him made it clear she needed him alive and well.

But Newglo the bear-folk did keep running, and had no intention of stopping. How he ran as fast as he did, Nero couldn’t even begin to fathom. Taking a sharp turn down a narrow street, Newglo continued to haul tail despite their large, burly size. Nero’s boots skid as he spun his body, cutting the same corner down the narrow street that his target did.

Nero saw Newglo take a right. Nero ran right.

He caught the sight of him running left through the alleyways.

Nero went left.

They continued this dance for a while, but it ended when Nero found himself running into his targets arm. Being close-lined, Nero flopped backwards, falling on his back harder than a turtle-folk at happy hour. His pistol landed on nasty, forgotten cobblestone as Nero laid beside it. Dazed, Nero saw the massive bear-folk tower over him with a sharp, sinister grin. Nero let out a “oof!” as Newglo the bear-folk lifted him by the front of his ballistic vest.

“I’m tired of running….” Newglo huffed.

“F*****g same,” Nero panted as he let his body dangle.

“Stop talking!” Newglo hissed in his face, still holding Nero by his vest.

Nero couldn’t tell if it was the smell of his breath or his stained white track suit that smelled bad. Both, Nero concluded in his mind, eyes still adjusting.

“Sir,” Nero mumbled, his hand moving to a side pocket in his vest. “I am a mercenary appointed and endorsed by the Transvollian Council of-”

“Bayside!” the bear-folk in the grimy track suit demanded. “We don’t care how many laws you government phonies try to make, we’re never calling our home Transvollia.”

Nero fished his fingers around in his ballistic vest pocket, keeping his eyes locked on Newglo, body still suspended.

“I’d be willing to agree with you,” Nero mentioned, hands still busy. “But you’re wanted for seven robberies, two counts of arson, and one count of reckless endangerment of a child.”

“I was teaching them how to swim!” the bear growled, hurling Nero through the air. With a release of his large paw-like hands, Newglo the bear denizen threw Nero into a dirty stone wall. He winced in pain as he laid on the slimy ground, not far from some back alley trash machines.

In his grasp, Nero clutched salvation, making sure to keep it hidden.

“You threw a kid into the f*****g bay in order to escape the guards,” Nero coughed, pulling himself to his feet. “Clever in a pinch, but you gotta admit, that was a dick move, dude.”

Heavy stomps carried Newglo to Nero, once again the denizen reaching to grab him by the vest. But before he could, something sharp stabbed him in the ribs, right through his sweat-stained attire. Newglo kicked Nero to the ground, both denizens holding their own injuries.

“You stabbed me!” the bear-folk protested.

“With a needle,” Nero added, showing the syringe he had used. He lobbed it carelessly into one of the dumpsters, hearing the whirl of the magic within breaking down the components. “My own potion blend. You’ve got about five minutes before you’re taking a long nap.”

Newglo blinked his eyes, shaking his head a little.

“Not before your skull is turned into red paste,” The mass of blubber and muscle huffed, bum-rushing Nero.

Nero’s body was slammed into the wall he had previously been thrown into, feeling some of his ribs crack. Blood flew from his mouth as a brown-furred fist belted the side of his face. Nero swore the seeing stars expression was an exaggeration, but when someone pummels you enough, you’re willing to believe just about anything.

Again, Newglo felt something stab into his body. This time, his belly. He let out a cry of anguish, Nero being released from his clutches. The human with the battered, bloodied face collected themselves as Newglo thrashed about, rolling around on the ground, holding his stomach.

“You b*****d!” he screamed. “What did you do to me?!”

“I honah lie duh nuh,” Nero attempted to speak with a broken jaw. He fiddled with a side pack on his left hip, opening a protective case for one of many beneficial health potions. After several rough jobs, Nero had learned hard lessons. One of which was to always keep your potions safe from breaking. That, and carry extras, even when you don’t think you’ll need it.

He leaned his head back, listening to Newglo cry in pain, uncorking and dumping a homemade health potion down his throat. After a few seconds, his jaw snapped back into place, with the rest of his body being rejuvenated. Good as new, Nero let out a happy sigh.

“I said ‘I honestly don’t know’,” Nero clarified for Newglo. But at that point, the bear-folk wasn’t even listening. He was too busy rithing in hot pain, holding his stomach. “You kept punching me, so I just jabbed you with whatever I had. It could be a couple of options, but-”

“HICCUP!” Newglo interrupted him.

Bubbles floated from his snout of a mouth, one even blew out his nose. Purple, vibrant, glittering bubbles began to periodically hiccup their way out his orifices. The bear-folk tried to get onto their feet, but the sleepiness of the first potion made it feel impossible. And the pain of the bubbles coming from his belly didn’t make it any better.

“Huh….” Nero mused aloud, popping one of the dazzling purple bubbles with his finger. “I forgot I made that one…..”

“Ooohhhh….” Newglo groaned, holding his stomach.

With a crash, the criminal bear on the run was no longer able to resist his arrest.

But Nero soon faced a new problem, staring over the large ‘folk that was now sawing logs, bubbles still floating from his lips. Nero observed that the target didn’t look like he was in as much pain as before, with the effects starting to settle. He hoped the contract holder wouldn’t be too upset about his condition. He was technically still in perfect health. After a few hours, both of the injected potions would wear off.

After that, his fate was in her hands.

You may make a few enemies robbing stores and lighting fires, but Newglo’s true blunder was shoving the child of a rich raccoon-folk into monster invested water of the bay. After Newglo’s little reign of terror, a hefty bounty was put on his head. The kid was alright, but the nightmares remained, from what Nero was told by the contract holder.

After hobbling over to collect his firearm, Nero found himself just watching the bubbles float from the snoring denizen, trying to think.

“Okay….” Nero muttered to himself, looking all around the alley. “Now how the hell do I move you?….”

He stood there, pulling out a cigarette from his coat, lighting it with a simple flame spell a friend taught him days before. Flame dancing at the tip of his finger, Nero puffed his cigarette aflame as his ears heard bells.

“Ice cream!” he heard a voice from the street not far from the alley he was in. “Get your fresh ice cream here!”

A bell jingled again, with Nero catching the sight of a fellow human strolling down the street, pushing a large red cart. Nero only caught the sight for a moment, taking a long drag as he put out the magic flame from his finger. Again, reaching into his wool coat, he pulled out a wad of gold colored bills that had been floating around for a while.

“Should be enough,” Nero nodded, hurrying down the alley, trying to catch up to the friendly ice cream human.

II

“Ice Cream!” Nero screamed as he strolled through, taking his time returning to the contract holder. Nero figured if he was going to make use of his new ice cream cart, he might as well give the ice cream away before it went to waste. “Get your free ice cream!” Nero repeated, with the market district now abuzz with a new question.

“Is that human on drugs?….”

The cart was large enough to act like a makeshift bed for the snoring bear-folk, still with enchanted purple bubbles escaping him from time to time. It garnered a lot of attention, with children soon gathering. Nero lead his march for free ice cream, offering to any and all. Some denizens followed close behind for seconds, thirds, and even fourths! Though many parents among the gathering crowd worried about the intentions, the fear of this being some sick game of poisoning others was thrown out the window. Nero himself was dipping into his own supply, rolling the cart with one hand, eating what was sure to be his 5th orange-vanilla cream cone in the other. Although there were later reports to the Transvollian Health Department, expressing grievances about sanitary conditions, the complaints fell on deaf ears.

“All ice cream must go!” Nero hollered, being a complete mess by that point. Half orange magic food coloring and half back being back-alley scum. His appearance didn’t slow down his momentum, nor take away the triumph succeeding in his mission. “Celebrating the capture of this di-”

Nero stopped himself, seeing the children of many races listening to his every word as they followed.

“I mean, bad guy!” Nero clarified. The children cheered, ice cream in each hand. He popped open the door to the ice cream on the large red cart, one of which being by the head of Newglo who was sleeping. He propped up the bear-folk’s head each time he would reach inside to grab more ice cream, handing it out to anyone who wanted it. Wrapped cones of ice cream were tossed about, with the old display soon turning into a celebration of sorts. Some of the fishermen hunting monsters in the bay even joined in on the fun, using some of the ice cream sandwich bars as bait.

Most of the market was entertained by this confusing display, with the ice cream man he had bought the ice cream cart from probably going nuts. Nero paid far too much for the cart, but the price of the bounty would more than make up for it. Perhaps Nero could write it off as a business expense? And did that even matter? Everyone looked so happy.

Except one….

Nero saw a raccoon-folk child, surrounded by supportive friends, all of which were telling her “He got him!” Nero slowed his roll, waving to the young girl who seemed to be the only one not celebrating. She was holding a little human doll in her arms, having trouble looking at the snoring criminal. Nero had only seen her briefly when he picked up the contract in person. The raccoon-folk child in question had still been crying at that point when her mother signed the paperwork.

Now, three days later, it was finally over. But was it over for her? Nero could only hope so. What do you tell a little girl staring at her former assailant?

“He can’t hurt you, or anybody, anymore,” Nero spoke, looking the small denizen directly in the eye. She smiled a little, with her friends letting out a massive cheer. In his heart, Nero could only hope that she would recover from such an event.

The stunt itself seemed to bring the contract holder to him. From the crowd, the contract holder emerged, like a ghost in the night.

“Any left?” a raccoon-folk woman questioned, tilting her head with curiosity.

“I think I got a couple more, but I might have to dig a bit,” Nero answered with honest intention, not realizing who he was speaking to at first. He popped open the ice cream cart again, bumping Newglo upward in the process. By the time Nero noticed his mistake, he jolted in surprise as he looked up. The respected merchant gave a polite yet dismissive wave of her hand. Nero nodded, closing the lid, with Newglo’s head smacking into it. He kept snoring, with another bubble escaping him. The kids of Bayside would point and awe in wonder each time.

“Your fulfillment of the contract is more than enough,” the raccoon denizen spoke, with her little girl hurrying over to her.

“Mommy!” the daughter yelled, clutching her human doll with one hand.

“Honey, I want you to meet the nice human who took care of that bad bear,” her mother spoke, with Nero placing his hands in his jacket.

“Oh, we just met,” Nero mentioned. He squinted with a smile as the little girl waved back at him. She was shy. Still traumatized, probably. But from her dolly, he took it she was alright with humans. Nero once again met the gaze of the respected merchant, said contract holder now starting to be surrounded by her friends. Some of the city guards were also approaching, not far behind.

“I had to improvise a bit,” Nero mentioned, poking Newglo’s forehead as another bubble emerged.

“How much was the cart?” the rich merchant questioned, her fluffy tail moving from one side to the other as she reached into her business suit. “I know you didn’t buy that for yourself.”

“Well, it wasn’t too crazy expensive. I mean, when anyone buys an ice cream cart, it’s gonna be pricey, but don’t even worry about it. I consider it a professional-”

Nero was cut mid-sentence, as the largest wad of gold bills he had ever received was placed in his hand. Nero froze, too stunned to speak.

“-courtesy….” Nero finished his sentence, blinking in bewilderment.

“I’ll be sure to pay an additional bonus once I sign a few more papers,” the merchant spoke, picking up her daughter, making her laugh as she bounced her on her hip.

“A bonus?” Nero choked.

“You seem surprised to be payed well for a job well done,” the merchant spoke to him, setting her daughter down. The child ran off to play with her friends once more. “Not only did you bring this denizen back to me alive, but you humiliated him to the point where I heard about it in the middle of a meeting. Do you know how much joy I got, looking out the window of my office, seeing the b*****d who threw my child into the bay, being toted around on an ice cream cart? And the literal cherry on top, you handed out free ice cream, bringing more attention to him.”

Nero considered what was said, putting the money away into his coat.

“I mean….” Nero began, but then trailed off. “I’m just doing my job.”

“And you should be paid more than you have been, I can tell you that much,” the raccoon-folk merchant expressed. “I did my homework, and knew you were the best mercenary for the job. Most of the mercenaries I hire are either too rough or-”

“Ma’am?” a Transvollian guard spoke. “Are you Mrs.-”

“Not today, I’m not,” she interrupted, not allowing him to finish. Nero raised an eyebrow, trying to get a read on the lady in the suit. Her tail would seldom move as she spoke with anyone other than himself, with her identity remaining hidden. She had simply been “Contract Holder” on file. Even when Nero was invited to her home, no names were given. Assuming that really was her home.

The raccoon woman in the suit handed a slip of gold bills to the guard, who was just as surprised as Nero had been. Not nearly as much, but still enough to leave someone in surprise.

What was more surprising was the vehicles that slowly rolled along the cobble streets, allowing for confused denizens in the way to hurry to the sidelines. Three black SUVs circled around the scene, with the guards soon backing off. Some other kind of dealing was happening here. Nero watched as raccoon-folk men in suits popped out from the SUVs, helping load Newglo into the back of one. It wasn’t hard for Nero to spot that the guards were intentionally turning a blind eye. Just because the contract had been made through official means didn’t mean official rules were being followed.

“May I ask what’ll happen to him?” Nero questioned.

The mysterious woman with the furred face thought about an answer. Then, a little laugh escaped her.

“We’ll be going over swimming lessons,” she spoke, with a certin venom in her words. With a single wave of her hand, she rounded up her men, telling two of them to keep an eye on her daughter while “business” was being conducted. As the mystery woman turned to Nero one last time before entering the back of one of the SUVs, she looked him in the eye.

“Money talks, Nero,” she told him. “So speak up, and be paid what you’re owed. Always.”

At this, Nero watched his target being taken away, with the guards all going about their business, like nothing had happened. Two raccoon-men in suits followed the daughter of the mystery woman as they went about playing in the market, faces stained with ice cream still.

With his pockets heavy, Nero looked down at the ice cream cart he now owned.

Scattered reports indicate that an unidentified body of a bear-folk washed up near the shores of Dry Rock during the following weeks, but news reports only covered the matter for a day. Besides, Dry Rock was a small town full of humans who toughed out frontier life. Death happened in those parts all the time, and wasn’t investigated. And being outside of Bayside’s jurisdiction, it wasn’t Nero’s problem anyway.

His real problem?

What the hell was he supposed to do with an ice cream cart?

Author's Note

This story is loosely weaved with the others in this "book" project. If you're curious to know more about Nero, Bayside, and the strange world it takes place in, check out the other stories. Each sequential chapter weaves together a larger tale, though each story can be read on their own independently. Read "An Introduction" within this book for more details.

Reviews

[Stu. T.H.]

A fine read. Despite not investing my time personally to read many long works, this chapter's worth it, author Kane Hagwood. I'm not a fond regular of the fantasy genre but still regardless an endorsing fan when there comes the type that I favour. This one aroused in me an informal desire -- A boyish desire from my younger days when I am too energetic in both the ways of the streets and pen, such a good time. I can safely say that I have had fun reading it as it did remind me of some tales I've knowb before and I noticed a few clever storytelling devices there that also reflect the narration tone to the work -- that reminds me of some fantasy games I used to play, mostly visual novels and text-based ones (I'm a freaking old-time sucker for visual novels even if I do not frequent them as much now) -- so your work brings to me delight from not just its fair quality but also its nature as a fantasy. Well done, author Kane Hagwood.

[Kane Hagwood]

Reading this made me really happy. When you put as much work as you do into a project like this, you never really know how it's going to go. I'm just happy to hear at least one person vocalize it. Although the approval isn't needed, it's like turning around, wondering if anyone is also experiencing this adventure with me. It's just interesting to know, and it makes me happy to know that my words gave someone value. I'm sure you've heard my ramblings about that before haha.

That you so much, Leon. you've made this experience being back here magical. Here's hoping there's more magic here, years to come, friend. And thank you so much for reading this piece. Please know you are never pressured to read any of my work, even if I send a request. It's basically just my way of letting people know, "hey, this is some of my work if you wanna check it out!" Just shouting that, down a long hallway in this forgotten place. I'm just flattered you enjoyed it, and I'm glad it brought back happy memories.

[Stu. T.H.]

I'm glad my comment made your mood better ~

[living lavender]

i loved this read so much - i wish this was a series. or completed. or a flipping show i could immerse myself in every episode. becoming one with this world you created. {these adventurous tales of nero are an addicting read.} i am a huge fan of this world you brought to life.

my favorite lines from this piece:
--falling on his back harder than a turtle-folk at happy hour
--but when someone pummels you enough, you’re willing to believe just about anything.
--What the hell was he supposed to do with an ice cream cart?

{they all brought a smile to my face. but the last line. genius.} lol

[Kane Hagwood]

Oh, don't worry, I have plans for that ice cream cart. I'm really glad you liked those lines, because those were the same ones that made me chuckle while tabbing away at the keyboard. I'm really glad you're enjoying the story. Not gonna lie, I thought I was just going to be posting chapters on empty, dusty shelves, with only a handful of people to finding them. Hearing what you liked in the story (even what you didn't like, constructive criticism is always helpful if it comes from the right place) really helps me feel seen by people who care about the work what I'm doing. Of course it isn't necessary, but it reminds me what I'm doing DOES matter. Thank you for your support, liv. I hope you'll read the next installment, episode, or whatever the heck I'm calling these. They've been fun to write :)

[living lavender]

i can't wait!! step right up! lol
don't sell it short. this is a great read. with beautiful world building. and a great concept overall. i am excited to continue the journey. count me in.
{i am invested.}