It's hard to keep time, even if you have a metronome at your side.
The Melody of Her Pulse
The melody of her pulse belongs to a strange time signature whenever he draws near enough to pluck at the shaking chords of her shaking mind.
She understands his reticence as clearly as she understands her own. She understands the arrhythmic absence of his sympathies and glances.
She hides from it all. She hides from his silence and loudness is the only thing that will ever draw her out.
And the melody of her pulse rests for two beats and the first note slurs for three; the timbre of her heartbeat drops without warning from treble clef to bass.
But she has valor. She trills the proper notes but at an octave or seven too high; she splays her fingers over the piano keys.
Her fingers slip - too many b sharps and d flats thrown in with all the naturals. The metronome ticks on, unheeded.
Both feet are on the pedals - all three pedals, all three - and she tries to fill in for the missing notes with slurs and the sostuneto.
But the silence is there. Her ears are ringing with all the sounds flying from the strings and her pulse throbs strangely against her skin but she feels the broken quiet all the same.
It's all in the technique. The proper finger movements, the training. By the time she moves on to the G scale, she says, she'll have forgotten that he was never there.
The melody of her pulse refuses to follow the time signature she set for herself. But she can't stop - she fears the silence because loudness is the only thing that will ever draw her out.
This piece is intriguing. I just love the musical allusion to this whole poem, and the way you blended it all as one, just flawless. The descriptions are very precise, and perfect, and for some reason, I feel like reading this poem quietly, and slowly, devouring each meaning. I also love the way you repeated the last line from the middle of the poem, it just worked its magic, and ended the poem perfectly. I'm so glad I could understand all those musical words because I did learn how to read music a few years back, for my clarinet lol, so yes, I could understand it. But either ways, the rhythm created is amazing, seriously, I love this poem a lot.
Wow that was captivating! I can't offer you the same review you gave as I am not as able to but that was wonderful. I felt like I was there. Great job!
I love this poem, Mina. I can actually understand and relate to "her". Sometimes the silence is too intense and you just have to get away from it. I think you have experienced the feeling also.
I have written a couple poems also, but nothing as correct and intense as yours. Poetry is not my strong point.
I adore the way you compared the human pulse to music. Wonderful imagery, and the rhythm has a very graceful feel to it, something rather rare in poetry, especially those without rhyme. A great write.
The imagery is vividly depicted, as I can feel what she feels...you have a moving way of bringing the reader into this moment.
"But the silence is there.
Her ears are ringing with all the sounds flying from the strings
and her pulse throbs strangely against her skin
but she feels the broken quiet all the same."~ Well penned!
I love the concept. Totally. I just wish I could understand the musical terms. Nevertheless, I can understand the kind of environment you're striving to create. This poem feels like it's written by someone from the future. Such mind-boggling metaphors employed in an almost realistic manner, I think is what sets your poem apart from others that just abuse metaphors. Delightful read :)
This is one amazing poem. I especially love all the musical terms that you included in this, which, if they are understood, make this poem that much better. I can see this flashing in my mind as I read. Your sentences flow smoothly and fit very well together. I do not find myself stumbling over any of your sentences. It seems like you put a lot of effort in this piece of writing. I'm sure may have heard this before, but you are one fantastic author. Keep up the good work.