confused

everything i seem to do is wrong.

i'm never good enough, or 

i've somehow 

disappointed you

i see you nearly everyday,

 yet 

i'm just another toy

to be thrown away when i've become "boring"

i'm not hurt, as such, 

but confused, sad, 

angry, and curious.

what is it about me the will one day be interesting, 

then annoying the next?

is someone dying, dead, 

hurting you, ignoring you,

that i don't know?

i can't keep waiting for the moments in time

when i'm the interesting  one,

it's never because i'm actually interesting anyway.

i've got something that you like, or want, or think could benefit 

you in some way.

but, beneath this anger, selfishness,

and cold, barren heart, i believe that you are not 

evil, or fucked up in the head.

this is a 10 metre-thick wall of protection.

i don't know what you are protecting.

 you'd never tell me

the full story

if i was the last person on the earth.

you know i am talking about you,

but i do not expect an apology

i simply want to know

do my feelings mean anything at all to you?