Too Far

I lay in bed crying. I had really done it this time. I love Jake and he loves me but I don't think we were quite ready for this. We had gone....a little too far, got caught up in the moment. "You, had. You and my daughter. JAKE WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!!" my father screamed loudly obviously upset. "She wanted it too.  I would not have done anything with her she didn't want to do!!!" Jake screamed back just as loud. "Don't you know how to respect your girlfriend?" Emmett boomed. "I gave her all my respect. The only thing I didn't give respect was her clothes which I tore off !!!" Jake fought back. He did not just say that. I sat up in my bed. No, no no no no. Now everyone was pissed at Jake including me. "Dad I know your mad and all but I'm going to go yell at Jake alone so don't try and stop me." I pleaded in my head knowing he could very well hear my thoughts. I got up,  grabbed Jake's arm and walked out of the door ignoring my mom telling me to stay and my dad telling her to let me go. "Ness." Jake sighed. "Just follow me." I said running all the way to Jakes house. I went inside and sat down on the couch; Billy was gone for the week. I put my head in between my hands and cried. He came over and put his arms around me. "I'm sorry for what I said I just...let my temper get to me. Please, please don't be mad Nessie." he begged. He tried to get me to look at him but I just couldn't. A few more seconds passed and I finally look at him and sighed. "I'm not mad." I hesitated. "I'm disapointed that you would say something like that. That was personal information, no one else needed to know that." "I'm sorry." he breathed. I pulled his arms off of me and looked at him in the eye; dead serious. "We weren't ready to go all the way." I whisperered. "I, I think we need a break." His head dropped and I could see a tear fall down from his eye. I wiped it away "Only a day or two before this situation does anymore damage." I said. He didn't respond he just sat there motionless. I put both of my hands on his face and looked at him in the eye. "I love you, I always will. Nothings changed I just need to clear my head out." I said trying to get that sad look out of his eyes. I kissed him lightly on the lips just to prove that nothing had changed before walking out of his house. I ran half the way home and walked the rest. I wasn't looking forward to what was in store for me at home. I replayed the whole scene at Jake's house not caring that I was close enough to home that my dad could hear my thoughts. I opened the door to the cottage and looked at my mom and dad on the couch. Their under eyes had darkened from all the stress...that I had caused. "I-I'm sorry." I choked starting to cry again. Last night had ruined everything. "Nessie we over reacted, but I can't let you go without some typed of punishment." I sighed it was bad enough listening to everyone yell, then that talk with Jake...I could have died looking at the pain on his face now I was grounded to. I could have defended myself, told him that I'm in love and thats what you do when your in love but I just walked to my room assuming that was my punishment. I want to be alone. I thought and laid down in my bed and fell asleep. 

I woke up the next morning feeling horrible. I now had a cold on top of feeling horrible. I laid in bed with a fever I assumed, a headache, sore throat, stuffy nose, and watery eyes. Not more than five seconds my dad and mom walked in concerend by my coughing and sneezing and my dad reading my thoughts. My mom kissed my on the forehead and gave me a glass of water. "Do you need Carlisle?" my dad asked. "No." I said lifelessly. "Its just a cold." I missed Jake, I needed him here with me no matter what happened yesterday I needed him. "Renesmee I don't think you should see him just yet." my dad groaned. "Yea Nessie." my mom agreed. "Mom if you were sick and feeling horrible wouldn't you want dad with you?" I asked. She just sighed and Dad gave me the "not fair" look. They informed me that I was still grounded so I couldn't leave the house and that the only visitor, no matter how much they bit their toungue over it was Jake because I started crying when they said no. They left the house and went to Carlisles while I opted to stay home. i picked up my phone and scrolled to Jakes name in my contact list. I pressed call and prayed he would answer. "Hello." he said gruff obvoiusly just woken up. "Hey...it's me. Can you come over. I know what I said last night but I miss you and I need you." I said biting my lip. "Yea. Yes, of course love." he said. I didn't bother doing my hair or makeup I didn't bother getting up I was to tired and sick. Before I knew it he was walking through the door in a black t-s**t and holy jeans frowning. "What?" I asked my voice hoarse. "Nothing. I just don't like seeing you sick." he said kissing my forehead. He carried me out to the living room and set me on the couch. He made him and I pancakes and he forced me to take cold medicene. "You look tired." he said stroking my forehead lightly. "I am." I barley said my voice cracking. He picked me up and laid me down in my bed he kissed me and the forehead and started walking out of the room. "No." I said. He turned around "Ness you need to rest." he whispered. "I am. Just lay down with me." I said. "Ness I don't think thats the best idea." he stated. "Please." I begged. He gave in and laid down next to me. I don't know why everything was so akward now. Would things ever be the same? 

Jake was distant and I didn't like the look in his eyes. "Jake whats wrong?" I asked. "Nothing, just go to sleep." he said. "Jake seriously." I said. "Alright. I think you were right about us having a break." he said and the words hit me like a ton of red bricks. I breathed out slowly I knew I was going to cry. "I think you should leave." I whispered knowing my voice would betray me. "Ness, I didn't mean, I still." "Please just go." I begged. He got up and he seemed to walk out of the room in slow motion. I laid in bed motionless, this could not be happening. I cried myself to sleep then.