Don't come in

Stay below the fleshing frontier 

Beasts of countless number!

Never scratch beyond the

Curtained enigma!

Hold your chains and quell enquiry!

Crash with laughter knowing

Fools who cut beyond 

The warped flesh 

Fall mad. 

Embrace dark descent!

Don't aspire to scrape the curtain

For above awaits Despair and Torment. 

Reviews

[J. B.]

This is a good piece. I would only suggest that you do not capitalize the beginning of a line or stanza until the last thought or whatnot has been finalized. For example:

"You will never experience loss,
Strife and disappointment.
Shout with laughter in knowing
Those curious to cut beyond the
Warped flesh
Fall mad. "

would flow better, for the reader as this:

You will never experience loss,
strife and disappointment.
Shout with laughter in knowing
those curious to cut beyond the
warped flesh -
fall mad.

[Kitty]

Thanks for actually bothering to review my poetry. Don't get your hopes up too high that I'll return the favour some day. I will try by the by.

Your point is interesting. But it is not what I am trying to achieve. At least, not in certain parts of the poem.

For instance, I'm glad that you yourself have inserted a dash by the warped flesh/ fall mad line transition. That is an area I quite intentionally meant to break up the poem's flow, and I'm glad you've felt the need to insert this dash because of that. It means that I've achieved what I wanted to achieve, as far as this effect goes.

Whether capitalisation at the start of every new line helps the poem's flow is another matter, and likely a matter more dynamic to personal taste as I just don't agree with you.

[J. B.]

No worries. It was just a suggestion/critique :) I look forward to reading more of your work.