There's A Fine Line Between Determination And Desperation

has he ruined you completely,

my dear

taken every ounce of your beautiful soul 

and thrown it to the sharks 

without a second thought 

to the point where, 

your dearest friend doesn’t know who you are 

anymore.

I refuse to believe. 

I know you’re in there somewhere 

no matter how destroyed you appear 

I can see it in the corner of your eye 

when we’re together; drinking tea. 

I’ve tried to break down your obsessive wall

told you over and over 

his vines are poison

but  

you’ve built it far too tall

and my hands are far too small. 

Reviews

[TL Boehm]

found this poignant and took me back to a time when I was young and full of bright dreams - watching a dear friend diminish by degrees. Well penned

[.]

This poem rings very, very true.

I have seen this countless times before....walls and barriers being thrown up to protect oneself from further heartache all due to the malicious actions of a former lover. You have accurately depicted this period of pain and internal sealing and the exasperation that comes with being a friend and onlooker to someone who has closed themself off to reality.

A nicely written piece that is very truthful in theme and content.

[H.L. Cerveise]

Love it. We all build walls around ourselves, for sure when hurt; however, those walls keep others and ourselves from others who still care. I agree with the other reviewer who said that they liked the different angle you took how it lets the reader decided who is talking.

[Desert Rose]

i'm not sure whether you are talking to yourself in the mirror or consoling a friend, or opening your lover's true potential,
whatever it is, i love the many dimension this poem takes..
great job Kirsty!

[Rachel Rashid]

I seriously needed to read this..Very touching and relatable. Keep up!

[PhoenixDown]

Awesome. Very, very awesome. I really love the angle you speak from, and the voice you used. "I refuse to believe." -- I can fully support everything those words can stand for. I enjoy this for its strength and encouraging tone, and I really appreciate its realistic conclusion about an issue, that within, only grows. Thank you for sharing.

[barleygirl]

I really like your title, which is what drew me here. I'm not sure if the title refers to the narrator or the person the narrator is addressing. Either way, your message is poignant & clear & relatable. It's such a frequent thing, where people change so much we don't even know them anymore. Your write: "I've told you over & over" . . . I'm thinking this might be the very cause of this tall wall . . . and in the end, I don't get the feeling the narrator wants to try to understand, but rather to change the outcome, change the behavior of the other person (which never works). I think this describes the standoff that many friends reach, when trying to tell them something "for their own good."

[Hannah Grace]

very touching, and very interesting. Great job!

[elvenom]

I'm not good at giving reviews, but this piece is pretty neat, especially the last three lines. I do believe there's a fine line between those determination and desperation.

[Ruth]

Sigh...this is touching...people can totally lose themselves in such love and it hurts and pains to see yet we can do nothing except be there for their fall...perhaps...reaching and tangible piece :)