I remember

This is about heartbreak, ptsd, emotional abuse, suicide, depression

I remember how much you liked to talk
And how we would plan to go on walks
You always greeted me with a smile
Even when I was in denial
For I was afraid to be harmed
But you always seemed so warm
But warm went cold in a matter of minutes
And you pretended I never existed
The harm I feared had come true
And everything reminded me of you
The promises we made were all fake
Because all you wanted to do was take
Here you left me bruised and broken
And there you left to find another token
A few months passed
Which I wish would have last
When I get home
I check my phone
I see a certain message
The fear I felt came rushing back
For I was afraid I would be attacked
For the message was “im sorry”
But all I could do was worry
In the end, I became your friend
With a wish for my life to end
Bruised and broken still
As I fill out my will
And take another pill
I know what we had was lost
But I would have fought for it to be tossed
For I have given up my fight
While I wait for the fading light
Messages dinging on my phone
I just want to be alone
I fall into the never ending cycle
Just dark no light disciple
I sit alone on the floor and cry
Waiting for my time to die
For you have given me more harm
Then I should have gotten from this part
Immortally bruised and broken
But still I would have given my life to you
For I remember all our talks
And our peaceful walks
The warmth I felt is out, lost in the cold
I don’t want a future to hold