If I AM ROMEO

Romeo and Juliet

 

IF I AM ROMEO

If I am Romeo, searching that

  Darkling love of her

Formed her path that ignited my light

She was where I blinded and shivered

  She wore the path that lost my sight

Opened-road courage quivered

 Not, in the poem of William Shakespeare

Opened my eyes, spare

Not, from the look of things

While Lucky Dube’s song gave me, glance

From where I saw her, countenance

Stood face bold amid all spear that threw

And broken not the mirror of her strew

 l

From once I met her, derived me joy

 Genuinely clapped sound opened my coy

Laughed-out-loud amid all what they said

She stood firmed.

 

Caught across the mirror that looked

My heart coughs across a breath of love that choked

 Me, and sneezed me out white pelf

A smell of love and life

When I attempted not to lust after her

Looking and searching for her after her

Desert not the heart void of love

Cupid in the shelves of forgotten gone

In the ecstasy where I dreamt, wet in dreamt

Formed the sweat, where pillow cushioned me dried out wet

Underneath, separated shadow from light of her countenance

From where there was no unison, they refused me, hence

From the abhorrence of heart-penury strife

Defined the wretched look of life

Filled my emptiness

From the riches of things

 

 That bonds us together, with same penchant

Ring she wore on my left hand

I swore to take her by my name; to the altar of my heart,

Even if, they refused

She is my Juliet.

Reviews

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i really like this...but then i am partial to the play...and the two last pics...from my favorite version..

i am not that keen on pictures with poems, like to let the poems create their own pictures...

but you have much interesting phrasing in this piece...and there is depth to the soul of it.

emily dickinson drives a lot of readers crazy with her random captilization ....maybe there is purpose, maybe not...but some do it.

[Onyia-Ali, Kingsley Chukwuebuka Benson]

Thank you so much for the review. Sometime I capitalized randomly for emphasis. As you said imagery is finely created with words not pics. I delibratly did it for an indepth image and the source of the poem's inspiration. Thanks a lot.

[SquinklaPsyOps]

What the character in the poem is trying to say is that there are people that try to control persons around us to try to control us.

[Onyia-Ali, Kingsley Chukwuebuka Benson]

Thank you for your review. I appreciate.

[asdarkeyesclose]

'not, in the poem of William Shakespeare'

i'm inspired a lot by Romeo and Juliet, I've written about them many times. this is a lovely poem, romantic and soulful in the way romantic poetry should be soulful. she is very lucky indeed. fantastic.

[Onyia-Ali, Kingsley Chukwuebuka Benson]

Thank you so much for reading this poem. Am delighted indeed for the review.

[Rahul]

Very clear pic. of "Romeo" you shown me. powerful write indeed. I'M speechless !

[Onyia-Ali, Kingsley Chukwuebuka Benson]

O! thank you for your admiration. I am grateful indeed.

[OBWhiteHawk]

I like how it seems old fashioned in the tone and you kept the feel of the Romeo and Juliet story, the original one. It's really nicely written.

[Onyia-Ali, Kingsley Chukwuebuka Benson]

Thank you so much OBWhiteHawk, I really appreciate your review. Thanks a lot.

[D.M. Grant]

Beautifully done. My favorite lines:

Ring she wore on my left hand
I swore to take her by my name to the alter of my heart
Even if, they refused
She is my Juliet.

Very well thought out.

[Onyia-Ali, Kingsley Chukwuebuka Benson]

Oh!, thank you soooo much, D.M. Grant.

[Leslie Philibert]

Good writing from Africa, as so often.

[Onyia-Ali, Kingsley Chukwuebuka Benson]

Thanks so much for your wonderful review.